This mod post is to address the issue of harassing private messages. In no way is this post to single out a specific user or situation but rather to address the situation at large. Fortunately this is not a topic that will be applicable to everyone, but it will apply to some and it may apply to others in the future. If this post applies to you or to someone you know, please know that you are not alone. The DPP community is a group of creative and caring people and this team of mods cares about keeping DPP as safe as possible.

What is harassment?

Harassment comes in different forms. There are the "trolls" who hide behind anonymity, typically coming from outside communities to post, comment, or private message people in an attempt to belittle, insult, or cause shame to people in our community. Harassment is slightly different, in that it targets a particular person or group of people with comments, posts, or private messages. Additionally, downvoting, which is a subtle form of harassment, can be targeted at a person and their posts and/or comments.

What you can do.

There are four actions you can take to protect yourself which are listed below in no particular order. These are options available to you and you may employ these actions as you see fit in no particular order. Your comfort level for action is yours to choose.

• Use the block user feature that is enabled on reddit. Just because someone sends a message does not mean you have to read it, nor any other future messages. To enable this simply click the block user button while viewing the reply in your inbox. From that point on, the profile of the blocked user, along with all their comments, posts, and messages, will then be completely removed from your view. You will no longer be alerted if they message you further. The block is completely silent to the blocked user. Blocks can be viewed or removed on your preferences page.

• Report to the mods. If someone is sending you malicious or shaming messages you can contact the mods of DPP. Reports are processed on a case by case basis and depending on the situation and the nature of the troll/harasser, we will ban, warn, or remove comments as necessary. To report to the mods please click "report" below a post or comment that is targeting or disrespectful. For more lengthy reporting click on Message the Mods which is located on the side bar above the moderator list. Explain your situation and provide links or screenshots when possible to show problem behavior.

• Subreddit moderators can’t really do anything about users who troll or harass others via private messages. For those situations, you should message the admins. To do this, simply go to /r/reddit.com and click the “message the admins” link in the sidebar there, or use the report button found at the bottom of each PM. Explain your situation and provide links or screenshots when possible to show problem behavior. Where a person is mass messaging people in DPP we try to coordinate and message the admins a full list of people impacted, so it does not hurt to let us know when this step needs to be taken.

• Boundaries. Where you feel comfortable ask the person contacting you to stop messaging you. In some cases the best line of defense is saying no in no uncertain terms. Any further contact at all is a violation of that request and can be reported to the mods by screenshoting the applicable conversation and sending that screenshot to the mods.

  An additional note on boundaries I will add is that it can be wise before you enter communications with a PenPal to think about what you personally are comfortable with sharing. Your name? Your life? Your kinks? Your body? There are many places for lines and boundaries. Think about what you are comfortable with and set those boundaries -- if any are important to you. Some situations can be avoided by communication. And always know that there is no expectation to continue. It is always your right to end things.

Again, I hope that this situation has not been yours to experience. To read more on DPP's harassment policy please Click Here

Be kind to each other.