Me and my fiance Josh are engaged and are very happy together. We're that sappy couple that all our straight and gay friends look up to and think, like, wow, #relationshipgoals. And we've been together since pre-COVID and I think we're going strong, all things considered. I'm really excited to pick a date, start planing the wedding, etc. but we're being patient at Josh's request.

But there's this one hiccup... and her name is Ashley.

Ashley moved into our apartment about 8 months ago because we needed someone to fill the other bedroom. She was young but really sweet, kinda dumb in the way that she didn't really know much about the world, her parents were paying her rent and actually liked that we were two gay guys, like we weren't going to molest her or anything lol. She also called herself an "ally" and was just really cute about us being a couple and all that.

I guess I started feeling weird when Josh helped her find a part time cashier job at the cafe that he co-owns with a buddy he's known since forever (we're friends with him and his family and everything). It was super nice of him, but immediately it was like she started becoming way too familiar with Josh, I guess since they spent a lot of time together at the cafe. Like, one days where Josh's buddy was working and other ppl were doing shifts, Josh and Ashley were just... hanging out at home all day? I know I know, he's gay and she's straight but I dunno, it felt just, weird.

And every time I brought it up Josh would be like, are you crazy? But it was the little things, the way when I got home they had done couple shit all day like making lunch together, watching TVs, running errands. She'd tell me stupid stories about how people confused them for being together, and I just laughed it off because what was I supposed to do? They just really seemed to be confiding in each other more, having inside jokes, being all buddy buddy in a way that, I dunno, made me uncomfortable but every time I thought or said something about it, it made me feel crazy.

And then the weird stuff started happening like 4 months ago...

The first thing was the condom that I found. It's not that crazy, we have a 25 year old girl in our apartment, so its not completely out of the realm of possibility. But the weird thing is that it was in the bathroom closest to our room, not the one near hers, and I'm pretty sure the wrapper was the magnum brand that Josh used way back in the day when we were first dating. When I said something that night to Josh, he looked briefly shocked but then made a lot of sense when he was like, it's probably just a guy she's seeing and they threw it in there. Which could've happened if they hooked up in the living room, sure. I never found another one...

Then there was her thong in our laundry, which I only found when I took it out of the dryer. Not insane either, because maybe it just got stuck in the machine and came out with ours, but it looked more like lingerie than underwear.

Then, a month later, and I swear i'm not trying to snoop or anything, but when I gathered all the trash from the different trash cans in the apt to take out when Josh and Ashley were at work, I noticed she started taking birth control. Even though I've NEVER heard her talk about a boyfriend, so maybe she's Tindering it up, I told myself.

Last week was sort of the final straw, and it makes me feel like I'm crazy and need someone to either validate me or tell me I'm insane and this is stupid.

I got off work an hour nearly at the hospital, which was a godsend because I needed the time to do some chores that I told Josh I'd do. Anyway, it's afternoon but all the shades are drawn. The apartment STUNK, like something I've never smelled before. Not like weed or anything like that, but like... something else. And our bathroom from the hall was closed and Josh was taking a shower. I walked in and said hi to him and on the way noticed the bedroom was a mess with all the sheets and stuff off the bed. I wish I had seen his face when I started asking him questions but he just merely said he wanted to wash them, so that's why they were off. Ashley's room was closed and I didn't see her all afternoon...

So I dunno. What is going on? And what should I think about all this? I'm worried that my relationship is becoming something way different than I had ever wanted, but a part of me thinks I'm just being absolutely insecure and crazy, especially since Josh and I haven't had a time to be intimate in the past 3 months (I know I know, it's mostly my fault)

And a part of me also finds it... weirdly hot.