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Which is not to say that you want to die.
You simply want the current concept of yourself to die.
You were academically gifted and coasted through to university bored and uninspired, and then realised that intelligence without discipline will only get you so far. Except, of course, there was no-one around to discipline you, and so you developed into a bundled ball of tension and anxiety until you hit the real world, which only exacerbated those feelings. A learnt helplessness settled into your bones as you had to fight every day to do simple tasks that seemed to come so naturally to others.
But that childhood drive to succeed still pushed you onwards, despite hating it, despite loathing it, and so you find yourself in a middle management position with all the responsibility and work and none of the perks of being genuinely, authoritatively, in control.
So you want to give it up. To surrender it. To erase who you have become and exist as nothing more than a walking, breathing fleshlight. A free-use cum dump, eyes glazed over in a perfect brainlessness. No more thoughts. No more autonomy. Just a ditzy, dumb bimbo, giggling as her Owner adds more bruises to her skin, as her Master coats more of her in his cum.
Let me erase what you are. And transform you in to what you want to be.
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