I'm quite passive in bed. I'm a bit lazy and when I'm tired I don't mind just getting it over with. I'm not often in the mood, but I do still like sex. What I like about sex is feeling him close, feeling his arousal and his orgasm can still satisfy me in a way. It also makes the bar to do it a lot lower when you know he doesn't expect a lot from you. And I rather have sex in this way, than him masturbating over other women (porn). But of course you can do this in different ways that are easier on the woman and allow a more passive way, either through quick handjobs or sex in positions that are made for that (like I believe missionary is). It's still something you should do in a way that least bothers.

Some men might find it boring or unsexy, maybe even plain wrong, but I think some actually find it arousing. I've chatted with a few guys that told me they developed a preference for sex in which the woman is passive. In a way that makes perfect sense as the natural male role in sex is the initiatior and the active part. Isn't it nice if you don't have the worry about the other, if you can just focus on your own pleasure, if you can just ejaculate and get to sleep or on with your day? On the other hand many men say they want enthusiasm (although I think it's unrealistic in most cases that sex can be both often and always enthusiastic since on average women have lower libido's than men). I think most sexual frustrations in men, even when they don't think so themselves, is more on the lack of sex than the sort of sex.

Do you prefer passive sex? (call it free use, call it bored and ignored, call it starfish, boring, monotonous, quickie, whatever you like, I prefer to call it passive sex or male orgasm focused sex) Do you actually practice something like this? Or do you wish you would practice something similar, to not have the bells and whistles, long foreplay and having to hold yourself back? I would like to talk about your and my experience with this.

I'd like to have a long term conversation in English or Dutch as I am from the Netherlands. I try to reply to all the reactions that are more than just "hello, how are you" even if it takes some time. So don't delete your invite or anything like that as I still come back to you if you respond to it in a way that shows that you've actually read it.