If you’d had told me growing up that this would be a post I would make as an adult, I would never have believed you.

I was raised in a religious family. I’d read my Bible cover-to-cover multiple times by the time I was a teenager. We went to Church every weekend, we did our devotions for more than an hour every night, and we prayed about literally everything.

Despite my sheltered and strict upbringing, and despite my deep reverence for my religion, I still found myself exploring my body and sex as a teenager (though feeling immensely guilty about it, still).

Enter my second girlfriend. We were in a semi-long distance relationship, and because there wasn’t as much sex as we liked, we sexted. A lot.

A natural domme, she enjoyed the idea of giving me ‘tasks’ to carry out at home, especially when my parents weren’t around. These started off fairly vanilla, silly and fun tasks like “go jerk off in the living room” or “go hump the couch”, but started to get darker and more twisted when she got a taste for domination.

A turning point for me was when in the middle of one of our ‘play’ sessions, perhaps able to tell that I was particularly eager to please her that day, she told me to go into my parent’s study (or the ‘Prayer Room’, as we called it in our home), pull out my mother’s Bible, open it, read from the first verse I saw, all while I jerked off over its open pages.

I followed every one of her instructions, but I was trembling as I did. I had no idea how to describe what I was feeling at that time, but it felt like a confused mix of erotic excitement and total/utter fear. The guilt overwhelmed me soon after, and I thought I would swear off doing anything like that again. But the next time we played, I asked for more. And there was unlocked an entirely new fetish for the religious, churchgoing me - blasphemy.

We eventually parted ways for entirely separate reasons, and that was when I came onto Reddit and explored this fetish with strangers from all walks of life - atheists, those raised religious, even some who remained religious but identified with the arousal I described in this post. In that time, I’ve had my boundaries tested, my mind corrupted, and my body doing things I never would have remotely imagined I was ever capable of. I’ve defiled every aspect of this religion that I held sacred and dear, despite in some way, still remaining religious. I might be going to hell, I might not be.

If any of this intrigued you, I’d love to chat, regardless of your orientation, belief or gender!

The Prayer Room awaits.