Fucking horrible weekend and family of course sucks, I can't take their bipolar attitude anymore.

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Fucking horrible weekend and family of course sucks, I can't take their bipolar attitude anymore.

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This weekend really sucked, honestly, and always family negativity is really damaging me. Yesterday, I've had a good day myself, cutting some grass, and got a haircut, and had to go with my parent shopping, until last minute the other parent last minute had to get their friends to the house due to work; the parent told my siblings on the phone to clean. They immediately become stressed, which is a indication that there are no boundaries being shared at home (I do not have personal boundaries made at home, so that's why I have my own); and my other sister had a breakdown because she wanted help packing her camping bag and said \"she doesn't wanna go anymore\". FAMILY SHOULD BE ABOUT SUPPORTING ONE FUCKING ANOTHER WHICH I WAS FUCKING BORN INTO WHICH IS FUCKING LACKING, THERE IS NO SUPPORT SYSTEM AND FUCK ALL MY FRIENDS FOR MAKING ME SUFFER, AND WHEN YOUR SIBLING OR CHILD BREAKS DOWN YOU NEED TO BE HERE FOR THEM. INSTEAD OF BEING SUPPORTIVE THAT PARENT YELLED AT HER AND SAID \"WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM???\". This family does not want a relationship that is normal and wants a relationship based on what they want. On top of that, after my parent called my older sister, I recorded the audio to send to a friend I was venting to. I tried to be a bit discreet (as I was sitting next to her driving), and I secretly searched \"family counselling\" on my phone. but it seems my parent caught me when we went to another store and I was told to \"Delete it if I recorded it\". I covered it up by saying \"I was texting a friend like normal\", but then I proceeded to tell them (to my family) to calm down and lessen the tensions, but the parent quickly shut me down and said \"We're fine, it's just that (sister name) is the problem\". Which tells me that instead of being constructive and proactive, my family blames one another for their problems instead of finding a solution. I told them to \"do it for me, please, I have no friends\", but my parent quickly shut me down again. I suggested counselling, but they quickly REJECTED it. They want stuff done their way. And then just now, as my parents were preparing to take my sister to camp; another fucking complaining from my bipolar dad (yes, the other parent I just mentioned) about how \"we are the only family that doesn't do shit\", makes unhealthy comparisons to positive families, in a angry tone, and say \"one day when I die, you'll see how your life will be different\" which I fucking want to say to other people here right now who wants to bully me and to all my fake friends and bullies in the past, blame my fucking parents and the fucking occupation. Instead of making my sister excited and shit, there's always negativity. This family wants World War 3 and so is my fake friends, I'm the only person here that doesn't want it. My family admits there is no support network even though some of my family has friends and my family I live with is the only family I have in this fucking Canada. I don't have a fucking social and support system. I don't have real friends. I don't have anything left and I am really suicidal. And yet, some people think I am a attention whore or trolling, when my fucking pain is real and some people want to devalidate it and support this verbal abuse. I want a real family. But my \"family\" does not want it. At least a invisible girl was there for me and told me that \"nothing is my fault\". Wish someone can sing me to bed. I'm done. Bye.

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Posted: 3 months ago
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