Hello all. I am not sure what the point of posting this is other than getting it down and releasing it to the world. But here goes...

I am sure that there are two very distinct “me’s” in my brain. One who constantly tries to encourage and the other who constantly tries to destroys. You see, at weird random times I have an overwhelming urge to shoot myself in the head, or down a bottle of pills. That’s when the other me speaks up and says, not today. The feeling always goes away. Sometimes one voice is stronger than the other and lately the bad voice has been stronger than the good voice. I don’t think I’m crazy. I don’t talk to myself or have a conversation it’s just two very distinct thoughts occurring almost at the same time. Anyway, other than constant anxiety and feeling lost and frustrated the two minds problem is my biggest concern. Lately my good voice seems to have almost disappeared. Not entirely because he is still there.l, but he doesn’t seem to respond as quickly or strongly. Anyway. That’s my story for now.