I wanna kill myself I lost the love of my life because I was an abusive mentally unstable cunt the more time goes by the more I miss her and the worse I feel shes with someone else now and seems to be getting happier day by day I just wish it was me we spent nearly 8 years together she was and still is my entire world I dont know how to live with myself without her I will never find anyone like her I will never find someone as pretty it sucks because I love her so much still and shes moved on and is never coming back so I'm honestly probably going to kill myself I honestly cant think of a reason not to anymore I would be doing the world a favour im just a waste of oxygen a waste of space no wonder I got cheated on and my heart broken deserve everything I get I got arrested and thrown into psych ward last week over the same thing I tried to take my life I just dont see the point anymore everything I did was for her and I just want to get better for her but if shes never going to be with me again what the fuck is the point we arnt even allowed to be friends or anything again thx to me being a toxic prick its all hitting me like a tonne of bricks and I dont know whats stopping me jumping off my balcony anymore....... Caitlin if your out there I miss you so much I love you more then anything and I'm so sorry I wish I saw looked in the mirror sooner and slit my wrists sparing you all the pain I put you thru well its never to late goodbye world its been a hell of a ride