I just feel like venting a bit cause tonight I feel pretty bad. Im just here having one of those late nights that your mind attacks you. And I feel really lonely. And I'm just thinking how I want someone special in my life, and why has it been so hard for me. Anyone I've met that I have had interest in either doesn't see me that way or they have someone already. And I can't stress how hard it is to find someone who will give you the time of day in the first place. For a long time I've been trying to find someone I can click with that actually values my time and my efforts. But I haven't found that yet. And it's kinda making me lose my mind a bit. I have this severe lack of love and comfort in my life, i honestly crave it. Is it too much to ask for to have someone that you can chat on hours with, play games with and watch anime and movies with? Who actually text back. Who reaches out? Who sends you cute messages and I miss you and I love you messages.

And it hurts to think that after all these years I can't even come close to it. This cannot be life going every day solo like a lone wolf. Can't even put into words how much it hurts, how sad it makes me feel. I just know I'm tired of being alone really tired.

You mix all these feelings with dealing with life and its issues too and I swear it makes me not wanna be here anymore. I feel as If I'm locked in a box and I can't escape. 😣