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LMy apologies if I’m lumping you into a broad category but I’m going to make some assumptions here.
You want someone tall, dark (but not too dark), handsome, with a beard and tattoos , that has a dad bod- and by dad bod you mean ripped but with chest hair.... He comes off as brooding and mysterious but you are the key to getting him to open up more, he’s actually a lover to wine and the moody soft rock that try’s to pass it’s self as music now a days. He is somehow the embodiment of puppy pictures and Hugh Jackman sponge bathing. He’s out there, you’re going to find him, and you have the right to be picky.
I want a woman with curves in exactly the right places (gigantic boobs) whose favorite hobby is sending me nudes. Preferably you live close to me or you’re willing to travel on your dime. Romance is the last thing on your mind because you know I’m an emotionally stunted man-child. You gleefully believe my stories of that time I fought a bear and won. My penis (we call him Dr. Shlong MD) is the most amazing thing you have ever seen.
That’s not me, and that’s not you.
Let be realistic. Maybe the idea of a guy who looks like the love child of Bobcat Goldthwait and Chewbacca seems strangely appealing to you? Maybe I can look past your extra toe and love for The Hanson Brothers to see the real vixen you are.
What do I want from this? Where can it go? I have no idea but it’s better than what we have right now amiright?
Let’s see if this attempt at standing out actually works. Say hi
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