Recently I started talking to and went on a date with a coworker. We've been working together for 6 or 7 months and we've had many pleasant conversations in that time. She's one of the only people I feel 100% comfortable looking straight in the eyes. We hold space for each other and it's great.

On Christmas she asked for help with something. I walked her through it, and we started chatting over Teams. We didn't stop talking, and she came up to my office and brought me snacks. I thought she was interested, so I asked her out on a date and she said she would love to.

Typically I don't ask coworkers out, in fact I've never done it because I work in a female dominated field, and I'm a relatively attractive guy so I get hit on pretty regularly. I'd prefer potential partners feel safe enough to approach rather than risk making them feel uncomfortable in the workplace, but this gal seemed interested. And she was!

Starting 1/1, we talked every day from 7 am until 10 or 11 pm. Asking questions, giving each other pet names, etc. She brought intense energy that I matched in a way I've never done before. It all felt so surreal, I just couldn't understand her interest in me. She said it felt surreal for her, too, that she was in disbelief that I was into her. I was completely smitten, and she seemed to be as well. We had a lunch date last week and the air was electric. We were both visibly giddy, and every time I found her around the building it was the same way.

We had a date on Friday, kissed a lot, held each other, didn't want to leave each other's company, or so she said. I say let's do this again, she says yes please! Says the date was amazing, told her mom all about it.

Sunday comes and she says she feels like she's caving in on herself. It's not "fair to you" for her to be in the relationship because she doesn't have the bandwidth. Her dad has cancer, young cousin is talking suicide, she's a nervous wreck she says. Says she needs to work on herself

I have whiplash. My heart hurts so bad. I know it was just two weeks, but I really had my heart set on her, and she seemed game

I said I would leave the door open. She said she'd love to meet me at that door again. But that she was concerned it wouldn't be soon enough.

My heart wants to hope. My brain says this is a "it's not you it's me" gentle let down. She says she has feelings but just can't right now. In our last conversation she did say she could change her mind at some point, but the way we left it felt more like "it's over".

What would you do? Would you take her at her word and hold out hope? Or do you think my assessment is accurate that she just doesn't want to continue with me?

It's all so confusing. She was just gushing about me, and I about her, making plans, and then this.