It all started when I was 14 now (in my 20s) I was a freshman and he was a senior he didn't even notice me. I always knew I needed him but was too scared. Finally at 22 I reached out and we ended up having casual sex but nothing more. Eventually I even said I wish you would date me and he replied well I'm not looking for that. But we had also matched on a dating site and his profile said he was looking for long term???????

I feel like I can't breathe without him We know each other minimally because he never took the innovative to know me he didn't seem like he wanted to by the end he barley responded to my text.

How do I get him to give me a real shot? My heart is going. To ache every day for the rest of my life if I don't try. No amount of pushing this away has made it go away. It's been an entire year since we started hooking up and we went no contact since like October I believe :( bc he was just using me.