I spent most of my 20s being antisocial and doing nothing but working as much as possible. I never knew how to socialize and didn’t want to do it either, because the idea of having to tell a woman “ let’s go back to my place, but be quiet so my mom doesn’t wake up” was the most unsexy scenario I could think of being in.

I moved out when I was 27 into a new modern condo, and one year later started dating what I hoped to be my future wife, but despite how much of our lives and interests we had in common, she didn’t respect my boundaries, and wanted me to be on board with her career choice, despite her not working hard enough to attain the successes she thinks she’ll get. Nearly two years later, the breakup still eats me alive at times, and I haven’t seriously dated since.

I turned 30 last year, and I just have this feeling that, despite all my best intentions, I’m a failure. Most people around my age have already gotten into serious relationships, married, or have started having kids by now. I feel left behind and unworthy. I don’t know what to do with my life anymore.

I’ve started eating healthier and taking care of myself, but every day I just have a growing and sinking feeling in the back of my head that my ship has already sailed, and that younger women aren’t even available for guys like me anymore.

I’m not happy and don’t know what to do. I just feel like my life is a cruel joke that I wasn’t in on, and I just want to escape.

Can anyone else relate? Does anyone have any good advice for what I can do? I need help.