So two things worked for us...

1. We set dinner rules that everyone (even mom and dad) follow. The big ones are when we put something small on their plate that is new or out of the routine, they have to eat that to get dessert (usually chocolate chips). It's a very small portion, so it's not encouraging overeating. Dessert is a treat, so we aren't withholding anything of nutritional value if they dont eat something healthy. Also, we only make one dinner. If they don't want it, they don't have to eat it. But, their only other options are fruit and milk that they have to serve themselves for.

2. We light a candle. Call me crazy, but I saw it on tik tok and it worked. We just light a candle and put it on the table. They stare at it, talk about it, get disteacted by it, hypnotized by it, I don't know what the mechanism is, but it seriously works. I would estimate that our pre-candle success rate of getting them to eat new foods was 30% to 40%. Post candle, it's 70% to 80%. My wife thinks it's voodoo.