I know this is a bit long, but hang around for the "punchline" at the end.

Had a bit of a day w/ my 13yr old son yesterday. Had to pick him up from Middle School around 9am or so. Ran him to the urgent care. He was having really sharp pains in the general area of his appendix and everyone who he talked to felt he should get checked for appendicitis.

Told my wife I'd take the day. The way my work is set up I get PTO, hers does not offer PTO... so if she stays home we lose money. I also have a TON of PTO with my tenure built up so I have plenty of time.

So I got the kiddo and we got to Urgent Care. Long waiting times there of course. Urgent Care doc did a pee test once we finally saw someone. Ruled out any sort of UTI or anything of the like. Then they sent us with an outpatient appointment to an imaging place to get an ultrasound scan to see if they can see anything.

Told him he couldn't eat anything or drink anything until it was all done. Kid hadn't eaten since like 10pm the night before when he snacked on half a banana. I felt bad for him... but like... not too bad. We burnt time filling the gas tank and going through the car wash... then got to the Imaging Center.

Imaging had some trainee and her shadow doing the job. Took a bunch of photos of the impacted area and were obviously, comically beside themselves at being unable to identify anything. They brought in a 2nd opinion doc to look. He looks and says they were sending the photos back to the UC Doc and we'd get a call to review their recommendation.

Another 45 minute wait or so. All the while the hospital app on my phone shows me the results, they noted not being able to identify anything. I'm relieved at that but annoyed at the song and dance we're going through at this point. They come and tell me that the UC Doc we talked to in the morning is gone for the day at that point... so another UC Doc has to look at it. They do and about 30 minutes after I get results on my app we get a call... and they tell us the photos couldn't show anything (which I already knew) and then they recommend if pain was worsening to go to the ER for an MRI.

By then it had been 6 hours of our day together that neither of us had planned. He looks up at me nervously and I asked the doctor what to do if the pain is the same level or lessening. He at that point was like "You know what it's not getting worse..." Doc was okay with us "monitoring the situation" the next few days... so we opted to do that and go get a late lunch at Popeye's Chicken and get home before his sister was home from school.

Basically - the whole thing was a false alarm and likely just a combination of maybe some indigestion and GI issues plus probably a little bit of not wanting to be in school for the day. Of course the kiddo's health is paramount so we're going to do what we need to do for him. I did a lot of "bill me later" pressing on check-in kiosk's yesterday and we'll figure it all out when those bills come in.

So why is this labeled "humor"? This sounds like a horrible day for most dads, right? Thank goodness the kid's okay but man... what a day...

Before I get to that, I need to explain that today the school also has a half day that neither his mother or I were aware of. We kept both kids home today because they're not feeling great plus the school teachers themselves were basically like "We aren't doing anything important just watching movies today." Also - after yesterday... it's a hands up in the air thing from me...

They're also home Monday for some in-service day and the end of the 2nd trimester. We didn't know about that, either.

Now the punchline:

I had... like three weeks ago... on the sly... taken yesterday and today as vacation time just to have some "me time". I told NO ONE outside of my bosses who had to know. Not that I get in the habit of secrets from my wife - or that she'd even care - but also I wasn't chancing being given the "honey do" list when I was trying to just relax for a bit. We can do that list on Saturday and Sunday like always, right?

I had planned on going for a hike if the weather was nice, getting a decent lunch on both days, catching up on some stuff around the house that I wanted to do, aside from the list of what everyone else NEEDS ME TO DO... and more than anything I was looking forward to playing some video games to myself with no distraction...

Instead - kid or kids home both days. \facepalm**

But wait - there's more!!

On Monday - my wife and I BOTH took that day off together with the intent on filing our taxes, having a bit of a "lunch date" and being home in time to see the kids off the bus. We have the appointment with the accountant that we prefer to use set, were discussing lunch locations and the whole thing... hell she even sort of hinted at maybe "having the house to ourself" in that way if you get my meaning...

...I did mention that they're both home Monday, right? *rimshot\*

Gotta laugh or else you'll cry, I guess.

It's times like these that I feel like the hapless schmuck starring in some sitcom that's broadcast in another dimension or something. WTF is my life? Seriously!

Maybe it's a Truman Show type of thing? Ahhh well... is what it is. Figured it was funny enough of a roller coaster ride to share with the group.

Guess I'll hold out and pay closer attention to the school calendar the next time I plan on burning PTO time selfishly.