Interested in the range of opinions that the community here may offer.

"Bullying" has become a bit of a loaded term in today's society. My kids use it a lot, but often out of relevance. For example, I can be accused as their father of "bullying" them by asking them to do chores around the house and being firm about it.

When I was a kid, I had a lot of bullies. These were schoolyard variety mostly. I've always been a big guy, so in school it was I was "husky"... the kids all just saw fat. Nevermind I was always a foot taller than everyone else. I had to find ways to navigate this because the kids were ruthless. Verbally, socially, emotionally, physically... I've seen and been through it all.

I learned how to thicken my skin a bit. Later in my teen years I actually found a way to find common ground with a bully and several of them became friends - one of which is still like a brother to me almost 25 years later.

The school never did anything for me. My dad was from the older school where it was like if a kid messed with you, come back meaner. If that kid hit you clock 'em back. This is wildly outdated, and honestly I don't think it was ever really the best advice... Not to mention the way dad parented us as kids he was probably the biggest bully of all. It was violent to say the least.

So here I am trying to parent in a direction I've never seen modeled before... Not that it's the school's responsibility entirely, but they should be clarifying what bullying is and is not... and maybe instead of putting the focus on that term "bullying" they should put more focus on what "RESPECT" means... because bully or not that seems to be the biggest deficit kids are missing these days. Am I wrong?

Leads me to a secondary aspect of my question: Do any of you with slightly older kids notice a trend in this kind of bullying attention, and do you think it's actually helpful or productive? Schools still seem to say they're doing a lot for it but also aren't apparently doing it. Like I said maybe it's not their place entirely.

This doesn't even get into if your kid IS BEING THE BULLY... but I could see the conversation lead into that.

I've just been trying to do my best with my wife to show what respect is, how to joke around without isolating and "picking on" someone, and how to laugh things off as armor instead of letting every single word and statement pierce the skin like a dagger. Not sure I'm doing the best job but it's what I'm equipped for right now. Looking forward to other insights and approaches here!

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ALSO - ran into this meme in another group which sort of sparked my coming here to post:

https://www.reddit.com/r/memes/comments/186z4yg/were_doing_everything_to_stop_it_no_youre_not/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3