part 17

Me and Kelly didn’t get to speak right away. As she got up to go home, with Ken waking with her it was all treated like a normal day. Eating a quick breakfast while we had small talk, all I could think about was Ken’s cum inside her, on her. What they did the previous night as I slept. I later found out they were up until 5am fucking. Saying they chose to go in Ken’s room so I could sleep in peace.

I can’t lie I was hurting. After the fun, and sobering up all I could think about was how pathetic I was and how hurt I was knowing she slept in his bed. I was mad at Ken for what he did, and Kelly for what she did. But really I was mad at myself for letting it happen and deep down, finding it arousing. Though I still didn’t fully understand why I did.

At the time I still chalked it up to my porn addiction and thrill of seeing Kelly be as slutty as those porn stars I love. But clearly I had let it go too far considering the emotional pain I was feeling.

I managed to bury it all down for the last week, focusing on university and getting ready to go home for summer. Between that weekend and the fact we were going home, I wondered if me and Kelly were even going to stay together honestly.

In the last few days we did talk, it was, difficult.

I told her how I felt, and she said she understood but felt that in was messing with her. One moment I’m eager for her to be crazy and wild, the next I’m acting insecure and jealous. Despite what I think now, and how far we have come, I had to admit she had a point. She told me honestly that the sex with Ken did turn her on, a lot. But she wanted to be my girlfriend. I won’t go into every detail of the conversation we had, but i will say we didn’t do the best job of clearing the air before we went home for the summer. But I’ll explain where we left things off.

We were still boyfriend and girlfriend, we admitted there was a thrill in being sexually open, but didn’t plan to communicate with Ken again. Luckily there was only a few hours or so travel time between us so we had time to meet over the summer. Despite all that happened we were still together. Ken was no longer in our lives.

But it didn’t take long once I was home to start thinking of those times again. I tried not to, but it was like my cock was less responsive to regular sexual stimulation when watching porn. But those memories, Ken using her, and the shame that came with it. They worked me up in no time.

But I knew I couldn’t do it again, not with how I felt seeing Kelly’s naked body in his bed, seeing how used she was. Like before, for each time it turned me on, it also made me feel pathetic when post nut clarity hit.

It was about a week into the summer when i did something I shouldn’t have done. In an attempt to make peace with those nights with Ken, as well as satisfy some newfound urges, I asked Kelly if the idea of me being with another woman was a possibility, considering Ken, and the fact we we’re going to be away from each other most of the summer. As you can imagine I didn’t get the warmest response. But Kelly did very reluctantly cave, saying if I really needed to, then she couldn’t stop me. But that she wasn’t the happiest about it. I feel bad looking back. She clearly didn’t want me to, but because I allowed her to fuck Ken she felt obligated to let me have some fun. But of course theses things never run smoothly. So that’s where the story ends, with me spending a summer jerking myself into a shame spiral and trying to hit on girls with my girlfriends reluctant permission.

It turned out Ken was just part one in this part of our lives.

so this is where the events of Ken and us ended. Sorry this part isnt as wild, I just wanted to explain how things ended. It was a lot longer than I’d thought it’d be, but hearing the reception you all gave was really inspiring and made me want to tell it all!

as you can tell a lot more happened to me and Kelly and, if you guys are interested I could always tell those stories too! I’d love to know if that’s of interest to you all.

I guess I would like to know any and all thoughts and questions you have, if I should continue, etc.

it’s been so great reliving all of these for you guys and thank you for all the support.