I definitely internalized a lot of the racism I grew up being conditioned to, i was told my whole life blonde hair blue eyed white women are better that i grew up hating myself and wishing i were that. Even to this day i struggle. i was at a tourist spot and i was going to take a picture of myself with a landmark when these group of white blonde hair girls told me they were not done taking pictures with the landmark even though when i went there nobody was there. instead of telling them to piss off, i ended up saying sorry and stepped aside while they stood there snapping pics for their instagram for over 20 minutes with no consideration for me standing on the side waiting for them. Afterwards they left without even acknowledging me. these are the toxic effects of white supremacy on POC, even though i take social justice and equity studies now and knew i should fight back i was so conditioned to step aside and take the racial abuse.