Hey everybody. How about that last guy? Wasn't he terrible? I think it's becuase he has suffered either too much or not enough psychological trauma. Seriously though, give it up for that guy. It's not his fault he's incompetent and will probably die alone and penniless.

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You know what I hate most? Humans. Anyone here tonight a human? I was on the bus the other day and I noticed something: man's inhumanity to man. Have you seen this, have you noticed this? Sometimes these people, they take things that don't belong to them or say cruel things in haste.

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People ask me "What's your secret?" And I tell them: "I'm afraid that I'm not good enough and that no one will ever love me."

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I just flew in from somewhere else. Boy am I tired. This is because the flight was long and unpleasant, like most commercial airline flights. What's the deal with airline seats anyway? Sometimes I think they're small and uncomfortable to maximize profits in an unethical and inhumane fashion.

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I'd much rather fly on a private jet. Anyone here ever taken a private jet? Well I can't because I am not wealthy and society unjustly favors those who are.

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I had a really terrible job until recently. How bad was it? The management was abusive and didn't obey labor laws. But its ok becuase now I'm unemployed and starving.

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In all seriousness folks, I tried to bargain collectively with the other employees. Anyone here in a union, huh? A trade union? Well I tried to start one and my old job, but I failed. Yeah, I think it was becuase being a wage slave doesn't afford the freedom to take risks with your livelihood and becuase unions have been unfairly maligned in the popular consciousness.