Guess I’m finally getting this off my chest. A few years I grew very close to my friend who had been married for a year at that point. I was terribly isolated at that point, and in a state of complete loneliness and desperate for companionship, her and I spent a lot of time together.

Eventually her husband left the country, make her as lonely as I was which meant we were spending more time together. Before I knew it long nights turned into late nights, which turned into sleepovers, which led to her sleeping with me in my bed. It was obvious she was so unused to sleeping alone at this point and was trying to use me to fill the void her husband left behind, wanting to share a bed and requesting to sleep in my arms. I didn’t think much of it as I was already half asleep at this point and figured we’d both be asleep within the hour. Little did I know the situation would really get the best of us.

I was wearing a shirt and in my pants (boxers) and her one of my shirts and in her panties, as I had given her my own clothes to sleep in as she didn’t bring her own not expecting she would spend the night. (Yes I’m aware it all seems blatantly obvious in hindsight but it wasn’t apparent to me at the time). At this point her loneliness and my lack of judgment was what made us cross the line. I hadn’t slept with someone for a good year at that point and I guess the touch of a woman had really got my blood flowing and I just did what as natural, grabbing her waist and oblivious to how hard I was getting.

At that point I was still half-asleep, but for her this was her turning point of arousal, leaning more into me and adjusting her position and enjoying the feelings of my hands on her body. My hands had found their way to her arse and all of a sudden we could both feel it all. Her face in my chest and neck, my hands on her arse, my erection pressed against abdomen, her back arched pushing her arse into my grip, you could cut the tension with a knife.

Things got exponentially more tense from there, both of us unable to resist our urges and craving for touch, both constantly adjusting and holding our breath as she changes her position from being laying on my chest to mounting me with her legs around me and her head next to mine. Our bodies constantly moving and my fingers all over her arse, the constant adjustment would get my fingers under her panties until I too had adjusted to move my hands up and but them under her waistband and firmly grabbing her arse, fingers inches away from her pussy. We both knew we had reached a stalemate here where if this was going to continue, there wasn’t any discretion in it, and it this point she said the only words that had been spoken that night. “Please, I’m begging you. Please do. I haven’t had sex in so long.” It was impossible for me to resist. I moved her panties to the side and thrusted myself inside her.

The tension and silence was immediately cut. She gasped, buried her face in my neck, and let out a long high-pitched moan as I slid inside her. I had never felt a pussy that wet and warm before. It was like something came over me, and I’m sure she felt it too, our bodies were writhing uncontrollably, limbic systems completely taken over, feeling every bit of each other, as we threw away reason and morals to give into lust and desire. She was forcing her face into my neck so much to try and drown out her moans but it was all beyond our control by then. We wouldn’t dare make any eye contact to acknowledge the reality of the situation, we knew we couldn’t. To this day I have no idea how long this all had gone on for, it was utterly euphoric and lucid that every movement felt incredibly immersive, I had never been as disoriented since.

But you could feel it all building up, every movement become greater, every moan louder, every grip tighter. She was rocking her hips back and forth writhing into me and I could feel her pick up the pace and push into me more and more. She was almost trembling and hyperventilating and had started digging her nails into my shoulder and tightening her grip on the pillow under my head. Her breathing becoming more intense and the pitch of her moans getting higher and higher until all of a sudden she tightened her grip as hard as I knew she could and completely sunk into me.

I knew she had just came and could feel her pussy pulsating and spasming on my cock, making a mess all over me while wrapped around my cock, it fucking drove me wild that I had just did that to a married woman and give her what felt like the best orgasm of her life. It made me even more animalistic than I already was and I couldn’t hold back my desire to tighten my grip around her waist and pound her pussy with all the thrust and force in my body until I came too. I knew exactly what the risk was, and for some reason I couldn’t care less, it felt like every bone in my body was commanding me to push me over the edge too, and before I knew it my cock was the one spasming inside her while her pussy was still wrapped around my cock. It felt like it had been spasming for ages, I have no idea just how big my load was, but it definitely felt like the biggest I could ever have. We had made such a mess all over our bodies. It felt like we shared the same skin together from all the mess.

At that point we both laid there. With her on top of me completely sunk into my body. My cock still inside her. Both catching our breath. Until after about a minute she moves herself up me, my cock slipping out of her. I had no idea if my load was leaking out of her or not, it was all too wet and sweaty and messy to tell. She just moved over to my right grabs onto the other pillow in my bed, gives me her back and proceeds to get into her position to sleep. All I remember seeing in the dim light was seeing her having her hair onto the pillow, her back looked like it was glistening, I have no idea if it was or if I was just delusional at that point, and me on my back looking up at the ceiling and feeling my eyelids get heavier than I had ever felt them before and I proceed to fall asleep within the minute.

I had woken up to the sound of the door to my flat closing, locking as it did. The sun was already up and shining against the curtains in my room. I look to my right to see that she wasn’t there and I had start to wake up. I sit up and see that all her clothes and stuff was gone and the sound of the door must have been her on the way out. Realising this I just put my head back and continued to sleep.

I didn’t wake up to any messages from her on my phone, I think we both knew that would be the last we both saw or heard from each other. I was anxious for months worried about getting a text from her, especially if she wanted to meet or talk, realising I very well could have gotten her pregnant, and/or ruined her marriage. I never did.

I haven’t heard from her since. Not a single message, call or encounter. I still follow her online and from what I see she is still with her husband and they seem happy together, nor have I seen any news of her being pregnant or having a baby, which is a huge relief. I haven’t a clue how it didn’t happen but I’m glad it didn’t. It wouldn’t have been good for either of us. Knowing her I don’t think she ever mentioned it and must have been trying to forget the night since. It was the wildest most wonderful moment of weakness that I cannot possibly forget.

It haunts me to this day and I still get flashbacks of that night whenever things start flashing in my head before I have an orgasm. I actively try not to think about it or even forget it, but it seems like it’s impossible to. I guess tonight just like that night, I decided to finally admit to this and give into my desires to share this secret, in hopes of reliving it all while writing this out, and reading it myself and for you to do so too.