I decided to post my experience in case someone else is in a similar situation and is considering M4. We're a 45yo MF married couple, I'm a straight male CD. My wife is cautiously supporting of my "hobby" as far as she can be, but I never went out dressed except for a recent Halloween. We were looking for a safe place or an event where I could go dressed and we could spend time together, possibly socialize, maybe meet similar couples. It turns out surprisingly difficult to find such a place in Toronto. Or we didn't know where to look. Pubs could be creepy, but we could not find any CD-welcoming cultural/social events. It's incredibly scary for me to go out dressed. I saw M4 recommended somewhere. But to make it clear, we were not actually looking for sex and we're not into swinging or open marriage either. We're OK with other people doing it of course.

We were scared and expected an overwhelming creepiness but decided to go ahead and give it a chance. I was hoping for "medium creepy but still can have a good time" while my wife was more pessimistic.

We arrived around 8 pm and a very polite and welcoming staff registered our membership ($50 for both of us, personal details required so I advise having a private email ready), and no door fees because of us going as 2 girls. However, she had to go and ask and first said there was a fee. When I was ready people slowly started coming.

The staff was very friendly and welcoming. The receptionist, the barmaid and others were super friendly.

The facilities are very clean and stylish. We were still a bit grossed out of seating anywhere other than a bar area because naturally people are having sex on all surfaces. Most people come there for that, it's a sex club :-) So it's our problem, not theirs. Once again, everything looked clean and tidy.

We saw no other wife/CD couples there.

Most people were in 50 age group, some 40 . There was one very young and lovely couple madly in love that danced a lot and smiled and laughed, and chased one another, slowly undressing and having fun, a joy to see. At the peak there were probably around 30 people there, half of them CD/trans.

There were some seriously creepy dudes, and I mean wearing-winter-jacket-with-the-hood-on-indoors kind of creepy. That was to be expected, I guess. But still, very unnerving. But nobody bothered us; people seemed very discreet and polite in general.

We didn't get to socialize, except with the barmaid and the DJ - who both were very friendly. Nobody approached us, possibly because we were clearly a couple. We didn't get the nerve to approach other people. There were two groups of few CDs each around the bar area. One was busy chatting so we didn't feel like interrupting, the other were blowing each other, so, well, the same :-) They came to have different kind of fun and that's totally fine.

The DJ was amazing - great selection of tunes and amazing beat-matching without noticeable pitch/speed artifacts. I hate it when the music gets ruined by speeding it up etc. The DJ clearly is a pro and very carefully curated the playlist. I came by to express my appreciation, she was great! But almost nobody danced. A person here and there sometimes, and the dance floor was empty most of the time. Still, we danced, quite a lot (for us) and I got to dance in heels which was a very exhilirating first-time experience for me.

Bar was good, drinks are reasonable $8 to $10 a shot I think, $15 cocktails. Decent quailty mid-range brands mostly, but some good ones are present too. Unfortunately, no beer on tap, or I haven't seen a tap there.

I loved the experience, with some downsides but I hope to go again but it will take time to gather the nerves and convince my wife. She's not completely refused the idea which I expected, so that's a plus.