Coming soon - Get a detailed view of why an account is flagged as spam!
view details
65
[smaller subreddit] r/Denver responds to a request for advice with some (off-topic) advice of their own
Author Summary
bix783 is in smaller subreddit
Post Body

In this post, OP asks for advice on where to buy an engagement ring in Denver, USA. He mentions that he has a budget UP TO 15k, and says specifically:

My fiancé to be isn't expecting anything too fancy, just something nice.

However, the fine redditors of /r/denver can't resist ignoring OP's original quest for advice and offering their own advice instead. I'm going to post these comments in order of their current position on the page:

The worst part / biggest scam about picking out a ring is the diamond. Diamonds are 'falsely rare' meaning that they really aren't rare, but there is an organization holding most of the world's stock of diamonds behind closed doors to keep the price insanely high. If your fiance is ok with it, I would try and suggest alternate stones (Ruby, Saffire, etc). This gives you room to pick out a really nice ring, maybe a custom ring by an artisan. Seriously though, don't spend $15,000 on a ring unless you make a ton of money. Also, consider the cost of the wedding as well. My wife and I are doing a wedding about as cheap as we can and it is still going to cost $10,000. We make a decent amount of money combined and we are still eating ramen dinners to pay for all of it. The world has trained us to have these super high expectations of marriage and weddings. If you look back 50 years, these expectations didn't exist. Wedding rings and weddings were simple and didn't cost so much compared to the average income. As a side note, take her along with you to shop for rings if that isn't too non-traditional. Find out what she likes. I found out that I would have chosen the exact opposite to what my wife chose :P link

So that's the top comment. Not a store suggestion in sight. Next up:

Under 15k?? Damn, dude. Don't tell them your budget is so high. Keep in mind that higher price tag items, cars, rings, etc, are negotiable. link

This one is so close to being useful -- but them who?! Who are you telling?! Where?!

Finally, third down, a useful suggestion:

Just a suggestion, Sonny's Rocks near I-25 and Colorado is closing shop. They were in Denver for 20 years. I imagine they are cutting some sweet deals. link

Next up we get this comment chain:

Dude. I am talking from ignorance to your situation, financially and relationship wise, so don't get upset. 15k as a budget is kinda ridiculous. My wife and I got our rings, her engagement ring, wedding band and my wedding band for about $300 altogether. Get her a nice engagement ring, and wedding band. Don't spend that much though, unless you are filthy rich and she is the type to base your marriage off of a expensive ring. Save that money for important things. Too many couples focus on expensive rings and weddings instead of the ACTUAL marriage itself. Just my two cents. link

Reply:

I wish I had more upvotes to give this. Speaking as someone who's been married more than once, the rings and the event can be EXTREMELY expensive, unless you decide the expense isn't necessary. Amazingly beautiful rings can be had for WELL under $1000. link

Reply to that...

Not all couples understand this. The women sometimes feel its a competition against every other wedding and want to out do them. I had some friends who spent upwards of 40,000 on a wedding and were split up within the year. What a waste. link

STRAW-WOMAN BRIDEZILLA ALERT

Yeah, those women aren't my type. Well, I shouldn't say that. I should say the woman I'm with NOW isn't that type. hehehe link

Thanks for that insightful analysis. But wasn't OP just asking about a shop recommendation...

As a woman, I must whole-heartily agree with this. My husband and I's rings were about $400, and are perfect. You're not marrying the ring. The ring is just a marker saying this is taken. link

If your comment starts with "As a ...", you win a trophy for not being offended.

I had a diamond from a family heirloom and a band. I had them set the diamond in the band. My wife loves the ring. She's not the type to base a rings value of of its price though, I'm very lucky in that regard. My wedding band was $40 off overstock.com. Her band was about $100. We even had a small inexpensive wedding at her parents house by the lake. I'd say in total we spent a couple thousand on everything. link

Cool story bro. But what about OP's...

I'm so glad i read this. My fiancee and i are both college students and do not have alot to spend on rings. Some people in my family act like it's a tragedy that ring didn't cost thousands. I love my ring, and there ain't a damn thing ring with the price. I'd rather keep the money for our wedding and life together. link

Ok, but what about OP's...

"I'd like to keep things under 15k" Holy fuck. link

Are you impressed? Upset? You're certainly making completely useless comments on the thread.

These are followed by 10 comments, all at 1, that actually recommend shops. Confusingly many of them recommend the exact same shop, but no one is upvoting the first comment with that shop. Whatever, maybe comments were made simultaneously, fine. Then we come to this comment, which has been downvoted to the bottom of the page:

Man, I've never heard such balking at spending a moderate amount on a ring. 3 month rule gentlemen, if that seems a little much maybe you should wait until you both are better off financially. 15k for a ring isn't unreasonable, take her with you the first few times though. link

And the reply to that, which is upvoted:

Seriously? The three month rule was made up by jewelers. 15k for a ring is incredibly stupid unless you're independently wealthy. Put a down payment on a condo instead. link

Yeah, you stupid corporate shill!

Now regardless of what you might think about engagement rings, how much they should cost, OP's budget, OP's financial priorities, etc., I think we can all agree that the thread has devolved into useless circlejerking about those very topics, with the useful responses all hovering low down on the page and with no upvotes. I'll only briefly mention the implied misogyny (what women want is stupid, and if they want what society tells them they should want, they're bad people) or the fact that many redditors get very very excited when someone spends a lot of money on things like video games, cosplay, conventions, etc., but the thought of spending money on the person with whom you want to spend the rest of your life is so bad that they can't even offer good advice, they can only stop and concern troll.

Author
Account Strength
100%
Account Age
12 years
Verified Email
Yes
Verified Flair
No
Total Karma
56,121
Link Karma
8,534
Comment Karma
47,587
Profile updated: 10 hours ago
Posts updated: 5 months ago

Subreddit

Post Details

We try to extract some basic information from the post title. This is not always successful or accurate, please use your best judgement and compare these values to the post title and body for confirmation.
Posted
11 years ago