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Content warning: discussions of sexual violence and disempowerment, suicide
. . .
Basically the title. Since Roe v. Wade was overturned this morning, I cannot safely report a rape if it happens to me.
I've never had PIV sex and will never consent to it, so the only ways I can get pregnant are through immaculate conception or rape. And I don't think I'm God's type.
If I get pregnant, I will either get an abortion or kill myself. This isn't an exaggeration. I know my mental health and its limits, and I will die if I'm not able to remove an unwanted pregnancy.
If I get raped and immediately report it, my actions can then be monitored. If I go out of state for an abortion? Suspicious travel. Buy abortifacients? Suspicious purchases. Look up how to induce a miscarriage? Suspicious online activity. I wouldn't be monitored that closely normally, but I absolutely would be drawing attention to myself if I report a rape and then start acting suspiciously.
And the worst part? I don't know if I could ever report now. Because if I need to get an abortion, then my activity right after the rape could be looked into, even long after the crime took place. All it would take is one nosy, bored, or religious investigator to ruin my life.
This supreme court decision is going to ruin so many lives.
Right, it gives echoes of that thing where some Christians will pick and choose what they count as a sin despite the Bible declaring all sin equal. Gay people are going to hell, for sure, but people who wear clothes made of both leather and cotton aren’t.
i feel extremely resonant with this post. i wonder if threatening or attempting to kill myself would count as endangerment of the mother’s life. because i’d do it regardless.
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My therapist and I were talking about this as his daughter was looking into IVF, and apparently that’s banned in some places too because they use multiple embryos and take the best one, discarding all the rest.