This is gonna be a long one, I’m so sorry lol

A bit of background: Like three weeks ago, I found out that I have an ovarian cyst!! And not a small one either!!! This thing is so big that it’s literally pushing on my uterus and making it almost impossible to see my left ovary on an ultrasound. I was given three options about what to do for it: wait and observe it, birth control and waiting/observation, and surgery. Even before I was given the option to have surgery done, I put some serious thought into it and decided I wanted to go in that direction if it was an possibility. I’ve already been sent to the ER for a possible rupture of a smaller cyst and that pain is something I will NEVER FORGET and hope to NEVER EVER feel again.

Ever since I found out about the cyst, my mom and dad have both been encouraging me to seriously think things through and maybe not jump on the surgery bandwagon. My mom has had cysts and so has my grandmother so I know it’s at least a little bit of a genetic thing. But mine is way bigger than theirs have ever been and I want that motherfucker OUT.

Things came to a head when about two weeks ago, my stepdad invited his parents over for dinner and they asked how I was feeling since I’ve also had a myriad of other health issues to deal with lately. My mom informs them about my cyst and talks about how “if we go with surgery, it could possibly damage her ovary and make things difficult when she starts having kids. But if we don’t get it taken out then there’s still a chance it could damage her ovary, especially with how big it is.”

First of all: WE????? There is no WE when it comes to ME having surgery done on MY body. Secondly: since when is this about my nonexistent and hypothetical children??? I don’t want kids!! I’ve tried to tell her before but unfortunately my whole family expects children from all the women and it’s like speaking to a brick wall! She’s even said before that by the time my younger brother goes to college, that’ll be the perfect time for me to start having babies so that I can give her something to take care of.

Today she asked me to cancel my surgery consultation with a new doctor because she’s never met them before (she works in the medical field) and then suggested that I go see a different doctor that she’s heard good things about from a friend she works with. But the doctor she wants me to see wouldn’t be able to see me until the end of June and I’m sure as hell not waiting that long. So then she calls me, frustrated that I made another appointment with my original doctor because the other one would take too long to go see!!! I am just so fucking sorry for wanting to make decisions about my body that I feel are in my best interests and then unfortunately not including her in every aspect of them!!!!

I know this isn’t entirely child free oriented so if this gets removed, I completely get it. I’m just so angry and upset right now and wanted to get this off my chest in a space that I knew would understand. If I should post this somewhere else instead, please let me know

Edit: It’s been 10 days since my original post!! Good news, I met with a surgeon and am getting surgery to have my cyst removed!! Bad news is that I am both super hungry and absolutely PARCHED but am unable to drink or eat anything because I’m having surgery in the morning and have been unable to sleep so now I’m hungry again. At least I’ll get some good sleep with the anesthesia tomorrow lol. I’ll probably make an actual update post once I’m awake and aware of the world again after I say goodbye to my cyst!