Just still so appaled by the audacity of this situation.

My younger sister, 25(F) just had a baby last year. To make a long story short, she and her husband were about to divorce due to them getting married after only being together for 6ish months. Found out she was pregnant, and "saved" their marriage.

He's in the military, so he transfered bases earlier this year, with them moving to a closer state to where I live. Before the move, there was discussion of him being sent overseas for military things, and I had asked her if they had a plan if something like that were to happen. She assures they had discussed it, had plans in place so she'd be OK on her own if needed.

And now they're settled in, she has a nice new job and they have all the benefits from his job, they seem to be doing well. Then she asks me a couplr weeks or so ago, could I move in with them while he's sent overseas for 6 months to help her with her child.

Now, I work from home because I've chosen a CF life, but I'm in a leadership position so I'm still very busy all day long. Like, it's just not feasible for me to watch her <1yr old baby all day long for her. I think a lot of people assume I would just sit around doing nothing all day working from home, but I have equipment provided from my job along with other nice perks of my position, which I've worked hard for. She then asked me to quit my job, move in with her to be a stay at home nanny 24/7, and help care for her child while she does her 1hr commute and 9-10/hrs shift. With no pay, and for the only benefit of "being family".

This is because she "doesn't want to give up her new job because the commute and hours demand her to be away from home for too long." But, when I had asked "what happened to your plan?" This WAS their plan all along. To try and manipulate me into helping them, instead of just hiring an actual nanny or I don't know, planning a little bit more before they decided to move or even have this child?

I don't like babies and kids, I don't want to be a mother whatsoever. I've made these feelings very apparent for a long time, and I don't want to sound mean, but I really don't care to meet this baby. I don't mind being the fun/cool aunt when she's old enough to remember who I am, but right now I don't want to hold the baby, I don't understand what the fuss is over a stinky, unintelligent, screaming banshee. But helping her when she's an older, more coherent being doesn't sound so bad, just support from a distance.

Now I still felt bad, because she is my sister and I was worried that her husband wasn't being supportive to her either. But my parents informed me that both them and his parents offered to care for the baby and their dog. His parents live like, I'm unsure exactly but close enough that they could come and babysit, or bring the baby to their house, and they're retired. Just a better option with people who want to help like that.

I'm just so appalled by her audacity to ask me to quit my job because she doesn't want to take responsibility for her decisions. It honestly felt so selfish to me, and not to mention I would be forced to give up my life, hobbies, career, school, apart from my happy marriage, you name it. But because I'm child free, she had wanted me to do this because I "have nothing else going on". Lol 😆

I just needed to rant a little about this absolutely crazy thought process forced upon me. How insane family with kids can be, especially towards CF folks. And I mean to be fair, I only work a supervisor job FT, am pursuing my Bachelor's degree, run an Etsy shop, and I volunteer on the weekends. But yeah, I've got so much free time to raise her child for her. I'll read and play video games too, ooh so yeah I'm pretty much just sitting around all day lol.

Anyways, I put my foot down and point blank told her how as much as I feel for her, I'm not in a position to help her in this way. I offered other forms of assistance, but advised that i simply couldn't just drop everything to move in with her. She obviously bit my head off, but she already has a new job closer to home and has free childcare as part of his benefits.

Now it's switched to wanting me to have a child so "they can grow up together". Just another battle I guess, but I'm still so frustrated about this and thought I'd share this bananas story haha 🤣