Hey everyone, I wasn’t planning on doing an update, but after meeting up with my ex, I feel like I need to get this off my chest. If you didn’t read my first post, the quick version is: My ex, Megan (27F), cheated on me a year ago with her trainer, Jake, and left me for him. Now, she’s back, saying things went south with him, and she wants to get back together.

So, we met up yesterday for coffee. I went in not really knowing what to expect—part of me wanted closure, part of me was still curious about what she had to say. We talked for a good couple of hours, and it was a lot to process.

Megan started by apologizing. She admitted that leaving me for Jake was the biggest mistake of her life, and she’s been paying for it ever since. Without getting into too many details, things between them weren’t as perfect as she thought they’d be, and the whole relationship basically crashed and burned. She’s been struggling ever since—mentally, emotionally, financially—it’s been a rough year for her.

But here’s the part that I wasn’t really prepared for: she also brought up a lot of things about our relationship that I never considered. She said that while cheating on me was 100% wrong, she felt like I wasn’t the best boyfriend either. According to her, I didn’t always make her feel appreciated, and she resented me for that. She mentioned that I was emotionally distant at times, more focused on my work or hobbies, and she felt like she wasn’t a priority. She didn’t use it as an excuse, but she said that built-up resentment contributed to her being tempted by someone who made her feel wanted.

Hearing that hit hard. I didn’t see myself that way, but looking back, I can see where I might have dropped the ball. I thought I was being a good partner, but maybe I was blind to some of her needs. She said she’s spent a lot of time reflecting and realizes she should have talked to me about her feelings instead of stepping out.

After we finished talking, she asked if we could try again. She claims she’s learned from her mistakes and wants to rebuild what we had. She told me she’s willing to take things slow and prove she’s different now, but I’m torn. On one hand, I’ve done a lot of healing in the past year, and I don’t know if I can—or should—go back. On the other hand, I can’t lie, hearing her admit her mistakes and explain her side of things made me feel... something. Maybe it's closure, maybe it's sympathy, maybe it's old feelings creeping back. I honestly don’t know.

Now I’m just confused. Part of me wants to move on and never look back, but another part of me is questioning whether we both made mistakes that could be fixed now that we’ve grown. I can’t tell if she’s just trying to ease her guilt, or if there’s a real chance at something better.

What would you guys do? Is there any point in trying to rebuild, or is it better to leave the past where it belongs?

EDIT: Update posted