I've been reading a lot of posts from those subscribed to manosphere stuff here, and I've come to realise that a huge part of why this is happening is the use of dating apps to get dates. The apps basically force everyone to judge a person by a few pictures and a short prompt and give the impression that how you look is all that matters in a relationship (kinda core to incel ideology especially), when often people fall in love after knowing and talking to someone. Given that men outnumber women on these apps, it's not surprising that men would find themselves in a highly competitive environment when in reality it's much closer to 50/50. This imbalance left a lot of younger men disappointed at themselves and, worse yet, women for not getting dates. I have this sense that dating apps market themselves as a way to find love, but for a lot of men it's just something that they find upsetting and disappointing. And when someone doesn't have the right support and structure, they would find the manosphere ideology appealing because it feels like their failures have been answered, even though obviously the ideology falls apart at the smallest scrutiny.

I'm sure some people will attribute this to patriarchy, but this manner of demeaning women and men (that they don't agree with) hasn't been mainstreamed for many many decades, and patriarchy certainly wasn't any weaker back then, so in my view the best explanation is the perception that dating apps is the only way to get dates.