I have been lurking the various related personals subs for a few weeks now. I've dmed some men and started some connections which have sputtered out one after the other because there was a lack of consistency and presence. So, I'm making my own post. If you're to take away one thing from it, understand that what I'm looking for is foremost something constant and emotionally intimate where we are talking at least every day, even if it can only be text or for a few minutes because you're busy that day. Obviously there is wiggle room, i'm not totally unreasonable. But, if you consistently can't message me daily for a protracted length of time don't dm me ^. I'm ultimately looking for something monogamous, serious, and longterm that goes inperson at some point and which at least carries potential to lead to us ending up together. I will not entertain anyone that is married, that has other littles or subs, or whose goal is not aligned with mine to a certain accuracy. I am slightly adaptable when it comes to the eventual inperson dynamic but i imagine ideally it would be something a bit close to TPE if I grow to trust you. Certainly, at minimum, it's going to bleed out of the bedroom at least a bit.

This will be a long post. I am not picky about most of your personal qualities physically or your life status, but I am particular about you in the more intangible ways. I think what I am looking for demands that I am both very transparent about myself and what I want. I also sense that the kind of person I'm looking for will not mind the textwall. In fact, he is probably encouraged by it.

About me:

Physically I'm 5'6, skinny fat(125lbs), white, wavy light brown hair past my shoulders, deep brown eyes. I would say that I am NOT very attractive, but i'm not freakish and I have been described as all the normal cute adjacent adjectives. I have a degree and have a job that can be done full long-distance. I really enjoy all kinds of nerdy things, i'm a big fantasy reader and gamer and I love niche, meaningful media(lit, foreign or arthouse movies, whatever). I would have a lot of fun doing and discussing this stuff with you. I don't get out as much as I would like but I really enjoy nature and consequently love hiking. I'm really curious about maybe starting to cycle to go on long distance bike trail rides eventually. I've been wanting to get fit, so I've been doing bodyweight exercise for the past few months in addition to runs and i've been more invested in my health in general, but not been constant enough at it. If you can help further that goal if we ever go in-person that would be great! I'm very open to all sorts of experiences and I'm quite well traveled and well read for someone of my age. I love language learning but have dropped off in the past year because of not being in uni anymore and having to deal with stuff.

Emotionally I am absolutely needy, but (imo) not to an overbearing degree. I require a reasonably consistent stream of validation and praise, mostly in but also outside of the bedroom. It doesn't need to be literally every sentence, but if you're the right kind of person for me it will probably be enough for you to consciously keep that in mind. Ideally we would early on be doing something together every day(calling, watching a movie, playing a game, whatever). It doesn't need to progress extremely quickly into being romantic and sexual all the time. I am looking for a longterm partner. I'm ok with it being slow at first so long as there is consistency. Constant emotional presence is something that has always been missing from my life and thus it is highly important in a partner for me.

Sexually, I don't want to delve into all of my kinks on a public post. I can say that I'm incredibly subby, like if-i-love-you-i'll-do-anything-you-want subby. Broadly, I'm looking for a daddy that can be simultaneously loving and kind and also very much not, with generous aftercare. Do whatever you want to as long as you princess carry me there and after praise me and hold me and cuddle me. I'm more demisexual and don't care very much about my own physical pleasure so much as the connection to my daddy and the knowledge that he is happy and I'm pleasing him. I think that the kind of person that this will apply to will share most of my kinks anyways IME. Feel free to imagine in the meantime, but I will divulge my darkest secret: i looove handholding.

Finally, I've buried this in the post because I don't believe it will be critically important to the kind of partner I am seeking, but it is a big deal for some people: i'm trans(mtf). i'm not a cd or a sissy or anything like that, i'm a girl. I didn't get to choose it. Important clarifications: a) i'm in the process of medical transition and so I have the parts for now. I have no desire to use them and would prefer they are ignored. I plan to replace them. b) i have a reasonably normal in-standard-deviation female voice. When I use it, I get m'aam on the phone and people in random voice chats almost always rightly assume that i'm a girl. c) I do pass if I want to. I think. I don't really think so but I am personally biased due to low self esteem and people tend to. To give you an objective measure, when i didn't realize that transness was an issue at first for some people I would often send them pics of me and have phone calls and most didn't realize at all and it was incredibly awkward later. That's the only reason I am disclosing here, and also because it is a big incidental part of my life that I should hope i can be candid with to anyone that i seriously might end up with. If you're in my life you will also find there is not an extremely insignificant amount of bs I have to deal with because of it.

About you: I am really flexible, but everyone gets a christmas wish list. Feel free to DM/chat even if you don't meet this exact sort of list, because really emotional sexual connection and compatability are by far the most important parts.

Ideally, you:

-okay this is actually required. be financially independent and a responsible adult. it's a big plus to be able to support me too, but it's not a negative to not have much excess beyond yourself either.

-are taller than me, and also a plus but not a negative if you aren't: significantly taller than me(significantly is like 6 inches). Taller than me is more of a hard than soft requirement, honestly, but I won't say anything is off the table completely without knowing you personally.

-age is the last somewhat hard requirement for me. Unsurprisingly, I want you to be older than me. It would be great if you were at least 4 years older than me. 5-10 ish range is awesome. 10-15 is very possible. Older than that it gets a bit more dubious, i think, but again, i am more concerned about the composite package that is you as a human. Meaningfully younger than me is definitely a hard no. I'm sorry if this is rude but when i see 18 or 20 year old boys post to these I kind of just laugh. I barely think men my own age are mature enough to navigate a cgl or ds dynamic on average. My universal experience dating men my age ish vs older men is that meaningful age gaps make more meaningful relationships, even if some personal relatability is lost.

-are thoughtful, introspective, and open-minded. I am not looking for someone that agrees with me on everything, but i am looking for someone that can acknowledge the validity and genuinity in my and others' worldviews. I also think these qualities make someone wiser and more pleasant, and are more common in older people as a consequence.

-are a nurturer and a guide. Probably implied by everything else but. I'm young. There's a lot that I don't know. I would love to be gently shown the ropes(lol) about anything I am curious to learn that you know or anything that you would like to teach me. I'm very eager to learn new things and potentially to adopt things you are interested in if i enjoy them. All of this applies to both in and outside the bedroom.

-are ambitious and explorative in any relevant aspects of your life.

-you want kids eventually. It doesn't need to be soon. I know it will be complicated in this case. It's still worth it

-are American. I'm American. It makes everything much easier and smoother. I'm not totally against foreigners, but I would be able to meet and potentially move to an American or at least anyone with a permanent residence in America much easier than anyone else.

-are not doing things that are highly illegal. I have no qualms against most nonviolent 'crimes' ideologically. I also want to run no risk of getting into serious legal trouble. It's a horrible fate because of my background, so I'm very careful.

Your DM/chat to me doesn't need to be NEARLY this detailed, but please put effort into it. I won't respond to low effort. I shouldn't need to explain what that means. I won't respond to anyone that sends nudes/explicit pics immediately. The sexual aspect is important but getting to know you is much more so. We can do pic swaps/verifications(probably phone/video call) or something reasonably quickly if we click. Mostly I want to have a conversation with you at first. Pick an interesting topic. Ask me about myself or something i'm interested in and I will probably procure an essay.

Would love to hear from you :)