(If interested, please read the whole post. You need to know the full context of what you're getting yourself into.

This post will not be a stereotypical cute one, it is a raw, honest post, diving into the darkness of the human psyche, fueled by emotions that control me.)

I'm a little with BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) and a lot of trauma. I have been in constant pain for the last several months.

If you've never dealt with someone with BPD, this post might not be for you, but if you are interested, then I ask that you please do research on the disorder. The symptoms are real and very intense.

I need a daddy who I can live, who's a caregiver, and who's capable of handling and enduring my emotional storms, and mood swings of all kinds.

I need a daddy who has a strong spiritual side, who believes in a Higher Power and the signs Its gives us.

I need a daddy who understands mental disorders, and spirituality, AND... the psyche of the human mind... even the very dark parts, the parts that people hide.

I have been connecting with my spiritual side, and my psyche in all its beauty, sadness, and darkness.

I need a caregiver who handle a spiritual baby with some level of psychosis.

I will cry, vent, have mood swings, enter little space, and even maybe scream at the right time and place.

It will be a lot to handle and witness. Even in just messaging me, my "persona" will noticeably change, and when I get clingy, panic, or enter little space, I will spam you.

I will need to be held, loved, supported, comforted, and guided. I like cuddling, lots of physical affection, and stereotypical caregiving acts like giving me baths and brushing my hair. I am the type of little who's needy and clingy, who needs a lot of attention and care giving.

I have faced a lot of traumatic incidents in my life, and they have negatively effected me. I am not totally sane, but I'm sane enough. Though, I do believe I show signs of psychosis. As a result of this, I need a caregiiver who will be very kind, and very patient with me. Who will speak to me in a sweet, soft, gentle voice. Who will guide me and teach me. Who will n o t order me around.

I am interested in exploring a mild sexual aspect of our dynamic, but that is secondary to the caregiving I need, the mental and emotional support that I need, and the spirituality and dark psyche that I want to dive into with you.

I am against being given "conditions." Example: "You must do this with me. You must dress like this for me. I expect you to do this for me everyday."

With help, guidance, support, and teaching, I can cook basic meals, clean, organize, give emotional support, and add a womanly touch to your life. Though admittedly, I struggle to keep focus and accomplish tasks. I become overwhelmed and that spirals into different mental blocks for me.

I intend for this experience to be like a very long make-shift dark, spiritual therapy session, in which we become one with The Universe.

I have a long history with therapy, and I do intend on pursuing a long future with therapy, but for now what I truly need is this experience and period of personal reflection, realization, and growth. I don't need to be in a doctor's office, I need someone to hold me, care for me, and love me. I am desperately missing that in my life, and I am learning that love must surely be the greatest, most powerful medicine.

I also need a safe place, and a safe space, where I can unleash my dark side and document it along the way. I will need the help of someone who thinks like me, or at least has experience in dealing with people like me, who is grounded and capable of carrying me every step of the way, and teaching me how to walk on my own, but with a hand to hold.

My appearance: I am Caucasian, short, and plus-size, with dark hair.

I am very insecure about my appearance. I am also insecure about my "personalities" and how I sometimes unintentionally express myself. I ask that you please be very, very patient with me and understanding. I need a safe space where I will not be judged, even if I have a mental breakdown or psychotically meditate.

Thank you for reading my post. If you are genuinely interested, please message me your age, location, and an explanation of why you belief we are a compatible duo. If you're comfortable doing so, I ask that you also please provide a selfie.

Thank you for time and interest, I appreciate it.