I want to be a Daddy , but having real trouble expessing myself and connecting with girls.

I have severe AuDHD, cPTSD and I have been sloppily succumbing to depression for a while now but I think I got it's number. Too fucked upto dial in though I have severe anxiety and usually a pushover but I want tobe a confident daddy to someone. I know , I have it it in me and I think I will be amazing. There is 'potential' ( a word I hate). Right now, I am having trouble getting out of my head z building healthy habits and freezing like abused cat around peoe. I am really good with Cats ( Thanks Autism)

I am looking for an experied middle. If things don't work out between us, maybe you can help me find someone by being a friend. poly people might understand the feeling. I want to be monogamus though, maybea a harem ( ultimat classic Cis male fantasy) one girl is more than I can handle though when I find her, I want to be connectd with her so much , you can't tell where one stops and other begins like those Japanes wood joints.

A mommy who will work with me , would be nice too. I could use a lot of babbying myself.

For therapists reading this? Am I intriguing? I think, my curse and gift is self awarness. Maybe you can throw a few therapy sesions and observe a mid curiousity) , I would love to talk to you.

Before becoming comatic inside I was a very curious , I used to love reading fantasy. Did it like it was my job. Western( praying for Scott Lynch to get better and write) , eastern ( used to read 1000's of chapters of LNMTL,). I love languge, humour ( a little nerdy about structuree of them), hanging pieces in chess and to no one's surprise my dog, shadow. I am big binger ( adhd dopime hound in me) movies,, series, food. I locked myself and watched 700 episodes of One piece, back to back. Kaizoku ony Oruwa naru. only anime I watched. . I'm 5'7 , Glasses, medium built from poor eating habits and awkwardly clumsy (Merrium Webster calls it being a boob)

I smoke ciggerates ( it roughly take smoker 30 tries to quit, I'm at like 12), at work, I catch myself so many times looking at watch at exact 4:20

If you are still here and interested in getingt back to me, please read it again and , send me a honest reply about what you think of me with no filters about yourself. Don't worry about being nice or PC.

My kinks are on the darker side. TPE, dubcon, incest, lactation, spit, creampies

Be quick girls, I am having a rare myself moment, I will turn into a frog tomorrow.

25 preferred. Worried.about tramuatisng people whose brains are stil growing.