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35 [M4F] #NY, #CT or #anywhere since I work remote. Talked with some nice people here but still looking for my person :)
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Defelj is a male age 35 looking for a female in New York
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IMPORTANT: I take putting myself out there seriously and want to ensure weā€™re not engaging with scammers or people with bad intentions. If we decide to move forward, I believe a phone or video call is a fair way to confirm weā€™re both genuine. I respect if this isnā€™t comfortable for you, but itā€™s important for me. Wishing you the best!

Hi,

Iā€™ve been dating over the last few years and have come to terms with my need for a dynamic in my lifelong relationshipsā€”something out of the ordinary. So this may be a little out of pocket for the childfree (I am child free and do not want children) subreddit but I figured Iā€™d give it a shot since Iā€™m betting on us haha.

I am monogamous with a career in sales that lets me travel a good amount in which I am grateful for. The better I do the more I can travel as well. I am hoping for a partner who is also successful in their career and goals but maybe has some freedom to be able to stay at places from time to time in which I have to travel to. Not a deal breaker if not, though!

I am predominantly a switch, though Iā€™ve leaned more submissive over the past couple of years. Power dynamics in this sexual aspect are very important to who I want to spend my life with. I want to find a partner who values, respects, and understands my needs. As I write this, I am more certain than ever that, to feel fulfilled, I need a loving partner whom I feel safe and deeply attracted to in order to fully submit. Iā€™m sure many here can understand the yearning Iā€™m speaking of, and I wish to have that yearning met, fully embraced and cared for by a loving life partner.

Physical attraction is important to me in a relationship, especially in the initial stages, though I understand it evolves with time. To ensure compatibility, Iā€™d appreciate seeing SFW photos and arranging a video call to confirm weā€™re both real and serious about getting to know each other. I take this process seriously and want to avoid scammers or those with questionable intentions. If this approach feels uncomfortable for you, I completely respect that, and we can part ways here. Wishing you all the best in your search!

My person would be skinny, though height doesnā€™t matter to me. (Iā€™m 5ā€™6ā€ if that matters to you, and I wonā€™t be offended if it does.) We all have our preferences and deserve to have our needs met! I take my physical and mental health seriously. I work with a personal trainer 4ā€“6 times a week, and I eat healthy most of the time. I also love to cook! My favorite cuisines are probably Mediterranean and Asian. Also just joined a flag football league for fun!

I like to read, and Iā€™ve been making music and art my whole life, though Iā€™m now focused on my sales career. I previously worked in healthcare sales for a long time, but Iā€™ve since switched industries.

Iā€™m a homeowner, but Iā€™m not tied to my current location. Itā€™s nice to have my own house, but a house becomes a home with your guiding hand.

I recently wrote a book, which is currently being edited. Itā€™s about my relationships with women and how, through those relationships, Iā€™ve come to know myself better. The book explores love and loss, neglect, childhood trauma, lust, desire, boundaries, and self-respect. I mention this because Iā€™ve explored myself mentally and emotionally throughout my life and find therapy to be a wonderful resource.

Iā€™m open to discussing our kinks, and I wonā€™t shame you for yours, but this post is really about LOVE and the search for that, along with the dynamic. Kinks can be discussed anytime in a chat. :)

Safety is such an important factorā€”to feel safe with someone is almost everything. And I say ā€œalmostā€ because, to feel safe and love someone is everything. That is what I want in my relationship with you. I hope youā€™re out there, and I look forward to talking more and getting to know each other :)

https://imgur.com/a/mmyfy7e

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Profile updated: 6 days ago
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a male
Age
35
Looking For
a female
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2 days ago