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35 [M4F] #NY, #CT or #anywhere since I work remote. Hoping my life partner is here.
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Defelj is a male age 35 looking for a female in New York
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Hi,

Iā€™ve been dating over the last few years and have come to terms with my need for a dynamic in my lifelong relationshipsā€”something out of the ordinary. So this may be a little out of pocket for the childfree (I am child free and do not want children) subreddit but I figured Iā€™d give it a shot since Iā€™m betting on us haha.

I am monogamous with a career in sales that lets me travel a good amount in which I am grateful for. The better I do the more I can travel as well. I am hoping for a partner who is also successful in their career and goals but maybe has some freedom to be able to stay at places from time to time in which I have to travel to. Not a deal breaker if not, though!

I am predominantly a switch, though Iā€™ve leaned more submissive over the past couple of years. I want to find a partner who values, respects, and understands my needs. As I write this, I am more certain than ever that, to feel fulfilled, I need a loving partner whom I feel safe and deeply attracted to in order to fully submit. Iā€™m sure many here can understand the yearning Iā€™m speaking of, and I wish to have that yearning met, fully embraced and cared for by a loving life partner.

Itā€™s essential that my partner and I are highly attracted to each other but obviously I understand as we age things will change. Itā€™s that initial attraction Iā€™m really speaking on, here. I hope you can understand that I canā€™t help needing to be physically attracted to my partnerā€”Iā€™ve tried to change this, but itā€™s an essential part of connection for me. So, Iā€™ll ask that you donā€™t mind sharing SFW photos to ensure weā€™re compatible in this area if you are attracted to me and will want to video call sometime soon for us to meet and make sure we are real.

My person would be an active person, ideally slim or petite, though height doesnā€™t matter to me. (Iā€™m 5ā€™6ā€ if that matters to you, and I wonā€™t be offended if it does.) We all have our preferences and deserve to have our needs met! I take my physical and mental health seriously. I work with a personal trainer 4ā€“6 times a week, and I eat healthy most of the time. I also love to cook! My favorite cuisines are probably Mediterranean and Asian.

I like to read, and Iā€™ve been making music and art my whole life, though Iā€™m now focused on my sales career. I previously worked in healthcare sales for a long time, but Iā€™ve since switched industries.

Iā€™m a homeowner, but Iā€™m not tied to my current location. Itā€™s nice to have my own house, but a house becomes a home with your guiding hand.

I recently wrote a book, which is currently being edited. Itā€™s about my relationships with women and how, through those relationships, Iā€™ve come to know myself better. The book explores love and loss, neglect, childhood trauma, lust, desire, boundaries, and self-respect. I mention this because Iā€™ve explored myself mentally and emotionally throughout my life and find therapy to be a wonderful resource.

Iā€™m open to discussing our kinks, and I wonā€™t shame you for yours, but this post is really about LOVE and the search for that, along with the dynamic. Kinks can be discussed anytime in a chat. :)

Safety is such an important factorā€”to feel safe with someone is almost everything. And I say ā€œalmostā€ because, to feel safe and love someone is everything. That is what I want in my relationship with you. I hope youā€™re out there, and I look forward to talking more and getting to know each other :)

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Profile updated: 2 days ago
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They Are
a male
Age
35
Looking For
a female
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Posted
4 days ago