Hey Reddit! Hows everyone doing today?

I feel like there are so many people (including myself) who get disillusioned with dating by the apps and Reddit. We can all pinpoint what we don't like a out them, and what were looking for, but somehow we never manage to make that match that counts. So how about we go about it a different way instead of banging out head against the wall. I can't help but feel like (one) of the missing elements is dedication to communication and authenticity. It's understandable, I do it to. We all think we have to sell the best version of ourselves which isnt the real deal, it's what we think is the most attractive, and the other person inevitably just sees through it. Were also less than willing to invest time or energy into vulnerability or emotional connections. So here's my attempt. A human based approach and not a social currency exchange!

I'm 31, skinny, shaved head, with glasses and a beard.

I like heavy metal, as well as some indie, folk, hip hop, and a bit of some other stuff too

My favourite TV show is The Wire (yes I'm that guy)

I'm into radical lefty politics, studied history, and have a real but non expert interest in space/natural sciences and philosophy.

I'm a cat dad and my little guy is the best, but who actually doesn't like dogs, rabbits or other animals?

I'm open to and happy with friends or casual, but would like something serious, monogamous and long-term.

I'm a supportive friend who wants the best for my chosen family. I'll tell you when you have food in your teeth (metaphorically and literally) and I'll challenge you, but Im told I also give meaningful support, reassurance and genuine compliments, and I value that. I'm the person you can call if you need to vent at 4am.

I'm a giving partner. Consent isnt just a word and I'm considerate of the needs and want of others and how to balance those with my own, and my ability to fulfill them. This is where communication goes a long way! You could have all the things you want and some you didn't even know you wanted, we just have to learn to communicate, to activately listen and to not judge with the cynicism that comes all to easy to many of us.

I think effort should be two ways and reciprocity is the spice of life, but it's not a tit for tat deal. Neither relationships nor sex are at their best when it's a just a trade for something else. If you're tired of everything in a serious or causal relationship being kept on a mental ledger and economized, I'm your guy!

If you're interested in friendship, lust, or romance, please feel free to send a message! Please be prepared to be up front, curious and invested, and I'll return the favour!