…I have no protocol.

Hello there!

Some of you probably will get sick of seeing me popping up on your newsfeed. I am still looking for my person. Before you tell me I’m too picky… I have spoken to a lot of people off here but sadly there was no spark or the conversations ran dry.

Before I move onto the spiel about myself and how amazing I am (not), I will include below what I’m after:

-a man, aged between 29 – 55

-located in the EU, UK and US (yes, decided to broaden my search a little as I had a lot of lovely American folk messaging me)

-no addictions such as drugs and cigarettes (drinking in moderation is fine)

-someone with good hygiene (I’m not expecting you to smell like the newest Johnny Depp perfume but as long as you shower and wash your bit, we will get on fine)

-preferably child free and not wanting children

-able to speak English (I mean how are we going to communicate?!)

-in full time employment (if we were long distance I would like to be able to split the cost of travel)

-not too bothered about body shape or weight; but I do like a nice looking face!

-someone loyal, loving, caring, funny, affectionate, patient and understanding. I’m able to offer the same in return.

-monogamous

I will NOT respond to ‘hru’, ‘u ok’ or if you are below the age mentioned above (I will not budge, no matter how mature and amazing you think you are) or if you are outside the areas mentioned above.

If your profile contains any inappropriate stuff such as pics of yourself or commenting on such stuff – again that is a hard no.

Whoa, I think I made myself more than clear.

Little disclaimer:

I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia (look it up if you’re not sure, sick and tired of dumb questions ‘ooooohhhh what is it, never heard of it???’) in late 2019 after having all tests done and none of them coughing up anything out of the ordinary. Ive been prescribed different painkillers to manage the pain, some days I’m good as new but others I’m in bed with excruciating pain. I still go to work and try to be as ‘normal as possible’.

I was also diagnosed with bipolar disorder at a very young age as well as anxiety. I’m taking meds for it and I’m on the waiting list and at this moment in time (20.03.2024) I’m still 2 years away from seeing a therapist.

This is not to gain any sympathy; more of a prewarning; a lot of people would get their hopes up about me and then would drop me like a sack of spuds the minute I was unwell.

If this isn’t something for you, I respect that. Just move on and I wish you all the best in your search.

Anyway without any further ado (I do apologise for the amount written above):

My name is Anita and I am a 29yo Eastern European woman who moved to the UK 17 years ago; I lived in London for a year and then relocated to a small town in county Somerset. Will share my exact location when I get to know you a bit better.

I’m 6ft tall (yes, I am really ‘tHaTT tALL’), 13st (about 190lbs-200lbs; yes I gained weight; no, I don’t want any tips on how to lose weight so stop messaging me with these), with green eyes and dyed red hair. I also wear glasses.

I’m an extreme introvert and always been since I was a child; no, I don’t need to get out of my shell so once again…. Just don’t. I’m far from shy and I can stand up for myself when needed.

I love my own company as well as my loved one’s, I only leave the house for grocery shopping and work.

Why try to change someone when they’re happy and safe the way they are?

I am a vegetarian, and it’s not an issue if you’re not. My choice is to eat meat and yours is not to.

I’m a tea and coffee addict, snack enthusiast, book worm and very much apolitical (I read the news etc but I just don’t care for them, as much as they don’t care about us).

I don’t drink or do drugs, however in I developed an addiction to vapes and it’s been ongoing for almost 8 years now. At least it smells nice?

I have 4 rescued cats whom I love with all my heart; in the last 10 years I rescued, fostered and rehomed close to 60 cats. I love all animals and have yet to meet one that I dislike. In my spare time I like to go for walks, nap, over eat, over think, visit my brother in London, read books, watch tv, go shopping with my mum and grab a coffee, chat shit with my ma, chill with my cats and my ma, listen to music and podcasts.

I don’t watch anime nor do I game much (does playing sims count as gaming? I mean clue’s in the name, it being a pc game?)

As you can tell, I’m relatively boring and basic but if any of that resonated with you, either send me a PM or a chat. Some days I might not respond immediately due to work and general well being so bear with.

To show that you have read my post, include ‘toodlepip’ at the end of your message.

Very much looking forward to hearing from you, wherever you are.

Thank you for reading and all the best!!!