How to tell difference between being hard on myself and holding myself accountable

Hi,

Does anyone here feel like at times they are too hard on themselves for their work performance, while other times not working hard enough? I’ve been in a role for 3 months, and while it is stressful, I like it.

I work in sales and this quarter I exceeded my goals. However, since I’m new to the role, a lot of what I got credit for was already in the works by previous reps. My manager is giving me good marks, and I’m told I’m doing well, however in my head its just because of the numbers I hit. Which isn’t entirely my accomplishment, if I’m being honest

This upcoming quarter things are staged to look different. There’s a High chance I won’t hit my plan, but my role is also new to the company. Therefore, lots of people don’t hit plan. This year is clearly a trial period for everyone.

My manager says I’m doing well learning all the systems, since a lot goes into things outside of selling (quoting, returns, order management). It is also known within the company how bad internal processes are. Plus my manager knows the training wasn’t very good and neither were the account transitions. I had a lot of early problems that have distracted me from selling more into accounts

When I compare myself to other reps, my sales numbers are better. However, I have less meetings scheduled with customers and less of a cadence with them. Overall, my customers are dismissive and hard to get a hold of. That will just take time, however other reps have customers who are immediately receptive and want the attention. They just haven’t purchased yet. Being in NYC as my territory, compared to Atlanta and Austin, is a component to this. However, I also need to outreach more to my customers and be more proactive.

Should I feel like I’m doing poorly and its just luck that has me at the top? Or should I just put extra effort this quarter into developing stronger relationships with my customers and ignore what other reps are doing. Every rep has their own challenges and while my accounts had more spending power this quarter, they are definitely more guarded than others accounts. So I guess its a pick your poison situation-accounts that buy right away, but are resistant to a new rep, or ones that buy later, but are immediately open to working.

I’ve been struggling with depression while working, and just getting through the day is a lot, but everyone has problems. How can you tell the difference between feeling like you’re being lazy or you’re new to a job and it takes time