It all started last year when there was a job opening within my company, which can be considered as a promotion if I get it. I have been eyeing for this for quite a while (applied to it before, but was rejected); So when I saw that the team is hiring again, I made a second try. Main reason for wanting the job is because it will give me an opportunity to pivot my career somewhere else, which I've been wanting to do for so long - so I can expand my skills and marketability.

I got accepted on my second try. However, what was offered to me was a secondment/mat leave cover.. Which meant that I'll be getting the job on a temporary basis, but my salary and job grade won't move up. The assurance was that if I do well and there's a business need to hire someone on a permanent basis, then definitely I'll be getting it. The initial advise to me was to trial the role for 6 months, then we'll revisit after that.

I took the offer nonetheless. I am very much interested in the role, and didn't mind taking a gamble in my career. I even declined an offer for promotion in my team back then because of this.

So anyway, 6 months have passed... I've gotten really good feedback on my performance; However my boss told me that even though the outlook is looking positive on me getting the job permanently, it is still not final - as they are still assessing business needs. I was asked to extend for another 6 months, which for me is fine - and I accepted. To be fair, I really liked what I'm doing here - there's far more variety, I'm learning a lot, and there's way more flexibility and autonomy than my previous role. That's why I was willing to overlook the fact that I am technically underpaid for the role that I am doing.

Now I'm approaching 12 months in this role; However there's still no definite news from my boss. I understand that it's already the end of the year, and it could be that the position will be given to me in January when I go back from my Holiday break. I'm still anxiously waiting for my boss to hopefully give me some good news in the next week or so about what will be the plan for me.. But the waiting is killing me (figuratively), to the point that it makes me tired of waiting - hence, the title of the post. She understands my sentiments around being stuck in the same job grade and declining other promotion opportunities. Because yes, I've had another one a couple of months back. She just tells me that there are things happening in the background that have been preventing her from making a business case for me.

Now, this is where I find it BS (at least based on what I know)... Because, a couple of months back, she got a promotion herself, and hired two new people externally. That's why it's a bit off putting for me that when it comes to me, she can't give me definite answers.

This is why I started exploring for other roles again inside and outside the company as a backup plan... My last straw would be if I don't receive any good news before I go on vacation in 2 weeks' time. I liked the role so much, but I am just tired of waiting. :(