Yes I know that's a self fulfilling prophecy. I took 1 single pill of Wellbutrin a year ago, but was so anxious on it (partly because its a side effect but also partly cause I was thinking myself into that anxiety if that makes sense) that I didn't continue after that one day. I tried being med free and just going to therapy but I went to my psychiatrist this week and I think taking a medication would help me actually apply the things I learn in therapy, as well as with my ADHD. She said she still really likes wellbutrin for me, and told me some helpful things to think when I do feel that anxiety on it. She said it will probably go away after a week or 2 and I'm being closely monitored. Yet still I am so anxious to take it. Im afraid if I take it for a couple of days I will become manic or psychotic, or will have a seizure (I drink almost every other day, just a few glasses of wine so I don't get physical withdrawal symptoms but I'm still afraid the Wellbutrin ''withdrawal'' will make me seize. I spoke to my psych about this and she said I don't drink nearly enough for that to be an issue but im just so SCARED it almost doesnt matter what she says). I'm so much of a control freak that doing something new terrifies me, even a medication that might help me.

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TLDR; Everyone talks about those first few weeks being rough and being anxious. I feel like I would not be able to deal with that, and as a result avoid taking my medication.

How the heck do I get over this hump. This is like the ultimate self sabotage. :(