Let's be completely honest here, if Xander were ogling her established girlfriend (cordy or Anya), the haters would take that as a window to call him a sex pest.

They keep saying that he makes sexist remarks without actually giving examples.

Did you mention "lying"?

So, in the BtVs cast, you have rapists, serial killers, etc, and you're listing "lying" in the reasons to hate Xander?

Are you?

Didn't know that lying was such a massive thing. Thousands of women are raped and killed around the world per minute. That pales into insignificance with "lying". Gosh, I wonder how many women are being lied to as we speak.

Prisons should be filled with liars. Those scum of the Earth!

Have you watched the end of season 5? When Xander "Saved the world with my mouth"?

Also, Xander faced the agony of having his left eye squashed saving Kennedy.

You have zero compassion. No Xander haters do.

Slut shaming?

You mean, when he called her clothes "Hookerwear"?

lol. It was funny.

As is when he said "Anyone remember when Friday was date night?", and she quipped "You sure don't".

Geekshaming him. :p

She gave better than she got. Which is why I loved her.

Agreed.

I swear, back in the day, Xander was as beloved as Buffy, Willow and Giles.

As you say, people these days just want to be angry at something, and for some BtVs fans, it's Xander. Why? I have no idea. I keep hearing that he makes sexist comments, etc. Do people not have a sense of humour these days?

I read the "What's the worst thing Xander ever did?" Post, and I just had to write.

I love Xander. Always will.

Xander helps Buffy to defeat evil.

If you're against Xander, you're on the side of evil.

I can't explain it better than that.

No.

Xander is one of Buffy's best friends.

All this sensitive shit is irrelevant.

If you're against him then you're against Willow and Buffy and Giles and you're for the enemy.

Here endeth the lesson.

It's touching digits in the way that friends do. Perfectly harmless.

And let's be completely honest here, if Charisma Carpenter wasn't going to go to "Angel", the Willow and Xander affair would never have happened.

Marti Noxon confirmed it.

So, nether Xander or Willlow were bad guys here. It was just easier that Cordelia had no ties to BtVs.

Tell me about it.

The haters are trying the show for people.

Just enjoy Xander for what he is: an adorable, funny gentleman. Ignore the haters. They're just a bunch of buzzkills.

Yeah.

Was in back in the days when Orange Grove were there, as far as the eye could see.

Thank you. :)

https://getyarn.io/yarn-clip/d40859c8-ad35-48bd-abf0-fb52cc9ee3c4

Buffy would disagree.

In the duration of the series, Xander saved Buffy, Giles, Willow, Buffy, and 6 billion people.

What's the counter argument?

He makes a quip about Cordelia's clothes? Who gives a flying fuck.

Buffy was the strength. Willlow was the mind. Xander was the heart.

https://getyarn.io/yarn-clip/d40859c8-ad35-48bd-abf0-fb52cc9ee3c4

It was touching hands. Not genitals.

Xander betrayed Willow? She owned him?

It happened because Charisma was leaving the show. Blaming Willow or Xander is pointless

He actually said "slut"? When? When he said that she gave Scott the half smile? Do you know what a joke is? She also hit him. Then apologied.

Buffy told Xander that "he can do better" when he was dating Cordelia. Is this not shaming?

So, Xander cheated on Cordelia? No mention of Willow cheating on Oz?

Right.

Just because I'm not a part of the hate mob and can actually think for myself. That makes me a Troll.

I'd rather be a Troll than a part of the mass hysteria mob.

Did you read about the person on Twitter (I think) who criticised a woman playing bagpies, by saying that the Singer of Metallica (James Hetfield) would "100% hate" her bagpiped rendition of Metallica songs?

5 minutes later James Hetfield replied by saying "This person does not speak for Metallica. I think you're awesome".

It makes me think of Xander haters. Go to SMG or Alyson, etc, with your opinions, and they'd say that they are wrong.

Xander was the heart of the entire series. Accept it.

I know. But it was a banter battle:

Before it, Cordelia said "That's so cute! Planning life as a loser? Most people just turn out that way, but you're really taking charge."

Then after Xander's quip, she said: "Well, Xander, I could dress more like you, but, oh, my father has a job."

Cordelia was a lot more brutal than Xander was.

Also, calling Buffy a rapist is Officially the stupidest thing i have EVER read. What the fuck dude.😭

Do you remember "Gone"?

Buffy was invisible. She walks into Spike's Crypt and proceeds to rip Spike's shirt open. Kissing his chest and then mounting him.

I don't recall her asking for his consent. He couldn't even see her.

Sex without prior consent is considered rape unless they have a mutually agreed upon dynamic where CNC is involved.

In a generation where Prince Phillip is considered a sexual predator for kissing Sleeping Beauty, all bets are off.

Watch it from 28:25

https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x6n6emy

I've heard people say that Xander is a sexual predator, that he's a woman hater, that he's this, and that he's that. Without a shred of evidence. Consider this a rebuttal. But with actual evidence.

Not really.

Caleb and Warren were misogynistic dicks who deserved to die.

They were men.

This isn't a gender issue.

I consider myself a male feminist, but it's Xander haters who really piss me off.

Xander is just the emblematic pinata.

When you put the ill deeds of every character into context, what with Willow trying to end the World and Buffy using Spike for sex, how the hell can Xander be the bad guy?

It makes zero sense.

Rape is FAR more complex than that. It is about what the person who is/would be the victim in the scenario is okay with, and is also about power imbalance and control over someone else. Claiming that as rape, though I can see your point, is not true. Buffy and Spike had a crazy BDSM relationship where they pretty much showed up unannounced to the other and initiated something. Buffy tearing Spikes shirt open and kissing him is meant to be playfulness on Buffy's part because not only does Spike instantly recognize it is Buffy, he enjoys it and continues it. Not until he remembers she's using him after they've already had sex does he tell her to leave. Is it toxic? Yeah. But Spike is not a helpless victim, he could easily stop Buffy if he wanted to. There was no power imbalance and also no instance of Spike feeling violated by Buffy in this situation. I do see how it can be interpreted that way but I do not think that calling Buffy a rapist is at all reasonable.

Would I call it rape? Absolutely not. It's absurd to even define that I just described as rape, especially, since you right said that the Spike/Buffy dynamic was very much rooted in BDSM. What with the public sex and the handcuffs, etc. So yeah, I'm sure, behind closed doors, those two indulged in CNC and maybe more extreme activities.

Why am I claiming that it's rape? I'm playing on the terrain that's been laid down by the Xander haters. I've had a person saying that Xander sexually assaulted Buffy on "Bewitched, bothered and bewildered". Even though he declined her advances.

Xander does, pretty much episodically do or say something that is misogynistic or creepy.

I keep hearing this. When I ask fir evidence, I'm ghosted. When was the misogynism? He's best friends with women. He says that Buffy is his hero. He doesn't take sexual advantage of Willow or Buffy when he easily could have.

I'm mystified by this perception that Xander is a misogynist. It wouldn't hold up in the court of law, as there's zero evidence.

He slut shames Cordelia, Buffy and Anya, acts as if Buffy is his property,

Examples, please. Buffy says that she loves him in season 7. Is that the fallout of Xander acting like Buffy was his property ?

People act like Xander was obsessed with Buffy for 7 seasons. Did he take the rejection badly? Not really. He was quite 15 year old boy. He quickstep got over her. He worshipped Riley.

Willow didn't act like Xander was her property? How about when she yelled at him for making out with Cordelia? Is this not possessive behaviour?

cheats on Cordelia

So, Xander cheated on Cordelia? Willow didn't cheat on Oz? Does the male only get the blame?

Humiliating and breaking Anya's heart publicly and then acting like he is a victim in her hookup with Spike and then taking that rage out on Buffy as well.

He left Anya at the alter, not out of misogyny, but out of being scared and petrified and realising that he wasn't ready for marriage? Are you perfect? Have you never made a mistake? The other characters have made worse worse mistakes, like, say, Willow killing a man and almost destroying Earth. I think that might outweigh leaving Anya at the Alter.

I think that these things are important because he may be brave, but he has a lot of really creepy traits that were meant to be "funny", when in reality men who act like that end up seriously hurting the women around them. That is why I think it's important to criticize the way he is written. He is a beloved character and it's a show that was originally geared towards a younger audience, so giving out the message that "your male friends will make you uncomfortable" isn't one that should have ever existed.

I completely disagree. Xander Harris is a wholesome character. You say that he's creepy? Have you known any guy, ever? The vast majority of men these days are way more creepy than he ever was.

Look at dating sites, about 80% of women would say that men have sent them unsolicited dick pics. Would Xander do this? Not really. Some people act like Xander, and men who existed in the 90s, were knuckle dragging troglodytes whose idea of romance was beating a woman over the head with a baseball bat, before having their way with them.

It's a fallacy.

Men today, generally, are far worse and toxic than they were back then. As a man who grew up in the 90s, trust me on that.

You get guys these days slipping women roofies. You see all the sexual aggressive harassment. You see all the infidelities. You see all of the physical and mental abuse. You see and hear about rape, that happens on a daily basis.

Xander Harris didn't do any of that. He had respect for women. All those ridiculous hyperbolic comments and baseless innuendo is just plain wrong.

It's just outright dangerous. Remember the Johnny Depp trial? It recently happened with an actor on the show "Wednesday". A woman made completely baseless allegations against him. It turned out that her only intent was to smear his name and cancel his career.

This is exactly the same. A bunch of fans doing trial by social media. If it went to court, they'd be jailed.

Xander Harris is not Joss Whedon. Nor is Xander based on Joss. The only thing they have in common is their sarcastic humour and their penchant for comic books.