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I already expected this would happen right from the start. I even bought beanies, scarves, and a wig in advance. I have learned to accept the inevitable. But here I am, 2 weeks after my first chemo, my hair in clumps between my fingers, and I am incredibly sad. Yes, I know it’s going to grow back, and it’s going to grow back with a vengeance. Just for now, let me mourn the loss of my hair.
I start chemo in a few weeks and I’m dreading the first big shed that I hear happens around day 16 post first infusion. I can’t imagine how surreal it’s going to be. So sorry you’re going through this right now.
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I felt the same exact way. Don’t get me wrong, the mastectomy was rough too. I’m fresh out of a DMX (3 weeks post op) and only have a 50cc fill to my expanders. Haven’t even looked down yet, my husband has been an amazing caretaker. It’s still traumatic but I’ve never been super attached to my boobs and the possibility of going up a cup size made me okay with losing the OGs.
Finding out I needed chemo (this past Monday) was way more traumatic for me. I LOVE my hair. I don’t want to look sick. I’m super active and love being in the sun and surfing and running and boating. I’m also going to try and cold cap…just that small sliver of hope is worth it for me. But I have a feeling this summer is gonna blow.