I’m hoping this is a safe place for a little rant. I’m hoping for support as I shout my frustration into the void.

My husband and I foster. We’ve been doing it for about 10 years. It brings us a lot of joy, plenty of challenges, and more than enough shared heartbreak.

However I need to get one thing off my chests - parents who sit in meeting and say “I’ll do anything to get my kids back” when they won’t/can’t/haven’t done the thing or things they need to do.

• Leave the abuser.
• Stop prioritising your own needs over those of the kids (cigarettes before food, new games console before shoes).
• Stop drinking to excess.
• Stop associating with that known sex offender! Don’t let them bloody babysit!
• Clean the house of harmful things (broken glass, needles, animal faeces)
• Take your prescription meds, all of them, on schedule. (Free here in the U.K., so not a money issue).
• Don’t leave your young kids alone at night every weekend while you go out partying.
• Believe your kids when they say your new partner/friend abuses them.
• Meet the child’s needs (food, medical, basic care etc) every single fucking day.

I know these things can be hard to do. I know mental health issues, poverty, lack of a support network, addiction, and the parents own trauma and life experiences can make these things seem so difficult to do, and to keep doing….

But stop saying that you’ll do anything to have your kids back, when you have proven time and time again you won’t.

Thank you for reading and allowing me to share my frustration.