I salute them. To be able to give themselves that much grace and have a partner who probably doesn't kick their ass for it or train them to clean without threat of violence or throwing away their things lol haha I'm crying. To have gross ass in-laws who are generally complicit in their son's behavior. Worse, I am a hoarder and it is so hard and overwhelming and the abuse inflames the need to hoard or buy lol but I asked for this. To have a partner who openly admits to doing these things and jokes about it. I have daughters and omg what am I supposed to tell them when I'm a hypocrite and I did the very thing I did not want to do. Oh my fucking God. I don't want sympathy. I'm a shitty parent for ignoring the red flags A shitty woman for not having a clean house and a failure of a person for feeling this way and not keeping it together.