Today sucked. Despite the fact that I accomplished the two main goals of the day, I feel absolutely overwhelmed and empty inside. I look at my 4 kids and I am so overwhelmed. Most days, I find myself having multiple panic attacks...wish I was joking. I've carved out some working opportunities for myself so I can afford to do more, save, and all of that. Omg it's so much. I'm expected to do so much and idk if I put myself in this box of isolation or if this is just what it's like given my unfavorable circumstances atm. I have so much to learn, so much to prepare for, i have a 5-hour assessment coming up on top of preparing for SCRUM stuff...on top of budgeting on top supplementing my kids' education, and all I get is "tHiNk pOsItIvE". Thanks, I am, but i still want to cry LOL. Husband can't do much because he works a lot and the relationship is sooo...idek hahaha I just want to sleep for 3 hours. So sick of being told to "just be happy" when I am actively trying to solve my problems.

Thanks for reading.