Hi guys, making a guide to an event that's almost going to end. But it's okay, let's do this.

Xie'Jing HP: Unknown (datamine pls) ATK: Too serious DEF: Pretty meh REC: wtf

Xie'jing is that boss where you either have to one-shot her or pull a really defensive team. She not only inflicts Curse and Poison, but she also can reduce your unit's BB gauge. Spooky. But thankfully, her sprite retains the wonderful plot so the battle is just a little more enjoyable.

HOW TO FIGHT THIS BISH

Step One: Set Maxwell as your leader. If you don't have maxwell, you'll probably lose because of the power imbalance between Xie'jing's plot and your squad's. Maxwell's wonderful ironing board flat chest neutralizes said imbalance, giving you an actual chance of beating her. Also, the LS and Light element thing is cool too but it's mostly the plot thing. THEMIS IS NOT A SUITABLE SUBSTITUTE.

Step Two: Fill your squad with a lot of buff light units. This would include manly men like Hogar who don't die of nasal bloodloss as a result of seeing Xie'jing's chest how spooky the boss is. If you can't afford manly light units, a great subsitute is your favorite waifu squad. Let this be the battle of the plot if you want to go all out on her. actually that may be a bad idea because girls get jealous and stuff happens when girls get jealous.

If you're really desperate, Sefia is a great addition because Sefia's prince-like nature and rather small chest helps negate Xie'jing's "plot presence". An example squad would be: Maxwell (Rex), Sefia (Breaker), Hogar (Breaker), Len (Breaker), Will (Breaker), Aem (Breaker) with a Maxwell (Rex) friend. Len is there for the ATK buff which is cool and also because everyone knows he only has eyes for Rin and Aem and Will are there because they're clearly Yaoi for each other they're semi-manly men who HAVE CONVICTION.

Step Three: Navigate your ass to the Vortex page and scroll down until you see Xie'jing's smug face. If you don't see her smug face, keep scrolling, even if you reach "the end of the page". Everyone knows this is the Vortex Gate and eventually you'll breach the time space continuum and end up in Lancia's kitchen in the Witch of the Abyss vortex dungeon anyway.

Step Four: Pray to RNGesus and summon. Don't ask, just do it. This is a nessecary step because you'll need every bit of luck to fight the Plot Goddess Witch of the Abyss, and if you end up pulling an Eric, give up for the rest of your life because life is tuff and you will gitrekt.

BONUS CHALLENGE: Fight Xie'jing with nothing but Eric's in your squad and as a friend unit. Yes, that is a challenge.

Step Five: Start the battle. If you can't start the dungeon because of a lack of Energy or a lack of Levels, cry to yourself, throw money at your device, and set it on fire. If this doesn't work, enter the Raid Battle gate and complain to the non-existent CSRs there.

Step Six: SAVE YOUR SBBBBBBB'S FOR THE BOSS. Not doing so could result in a Plot Twist > u >

Try and capture as many Skeleton Kings on the way to the boss fight. You'll need them incase Gumu's servers decide to try and troll the heck out of you since their complementary Skeleton King is probably reaching the end of his career as an Olympic Sprinter.

Fact: Players with more Skeleton Kings in their inventory tend to load faster. Try it and see what happens.

Step Seven: One Shot the boss.

If you fail to complete step seven, one of three things will happen:

1) The game will crash, and you'll lose your progress unless you can connect in time. This is where those Skeleton Kings come in handy.

2) Xie'jing will pull some Vile Revival rhyming bullshit on you, heal for 1,000,000 (think Maxwell's HP) HP, and hit your squad for enough damage to kill a good portion of them even through Mitigation. If you didn't mitigate, throw your device down the toilet and buy yourself a Nokia because clearly you don't have enough protection from the plot.

3) Something else will happen that isn't listed above.

If your mission ends here, don't be an idiot and give up. Gem because I told you to.

Step 8: Catch lame pantsu-husbando.

If you somehow fail Step 8 (There's a 71% chance this'll happen), cry to yourself and realize you'll probably get to experience the plot again and again. This is only a bad thing if you're a creepy idiot who doesn't like Plot.

Step 9: Attempt to hire Xie'jing as a prostitute using your great reserves of Zel and Karma. Throw actual gems if you need to.

THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT: It'll most likely require at least 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,080,085 Zel and Karma to do, since she's a very smug witch and she has standards (which are for crappy Water units with long white hair and a pantsu-goddess for a girlfriend). For every Fei you have in your party at the time of fighting her, that will lower the price by another 80,085 Zel. For every Fang you have in your party, the price quadruples because four is a nice number and Aliens don't wear hats.

Upvote if you get the significance of 80,085 (> u < )/

Congratulations, you've completed the Witch of the Abyss Lv 4 Dungeon. (If somehow you decided to enter the level 3 dungeon due to fear that Xie'jing's plot was just TOO REAL, please stop reading and question why you'd do that.)

Enjoy your derpy water dude, and remember that she's still there for another 15 hours if you wanna experience that plot epic battle again. She also might become the next X3 Trial boss, which is a bonus.