I'm in Boston tonight and am staying at what I can only describe as the most "trying-too-hard" looking hotel I've ever seen. Seriously, the photos look like something out of an AI image. But that got me thinking... Why not live out our retro-loving hipster fantasies for a night?
We can put on a throwback, scratched vinyl and get comfortable on the bed while we discuss the nuisances of unfiltered IPAs. Tell me how you really feel about the overuse of Mosaic hops in the current craft landscape. As we move in closer, we can whisper our favorite Iron & Wine lyrics into each other's ears and unbutton our up-cycled, vintage pants. Then when you're ready, I'll make my way downtown to devour you like you're an overpriced slice of pizza with an ingredient I can't pronounce.
To complete the fantasy, I do have a nice groomed beard and will make sure to pack plenty of flannel shirts and tight jeans. I'm also clean and hygienic, and the focus would all be about your needs. I always aim to create a safe and fun environment for interested partners. All shapes and sizes encouraged and enjoyed!
So, ready to go throwback and act like it's 2012?
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- 11 months ago
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