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Iâm asking what misandrist belief you say she preaches- Iâm not defending the comic, I said it was tone deaf and ignores the harm faced by men. I donât see her preaching misandry though and I thought she clarified her thoughts there. This cancel culture shit is wild to me, someone writes something vaguely offensive and then backs the correct and opposite view and is still seen as the worst person ever for something that people took really uncharitably? Like give me a synopsis please of what misandrist view she holds- even a sentence would be good
I keep seeing this, but how? I saw that original comic that people are referring to and it seemed tone deaf, but like it was making a point about misogyny that she experiences while forgetting that men are harmed by the same things. She clarified later from what I saw that she takes the harm men face seriously. What would you say is the misandrist belief that she stands behind?
Nah I definitely believe in people being held accountable for their words and actions, but I also believe that people are complex and can clarify and change, and damning someone for something they donât actually believe isnât great.
She didnât say men canât get raped at all. Even in the comic weâre talking about she was using robbery as an analogy for rape yes, and the point was that men often tell women that they donât believe them or they were asking for it and theyâre in positions of power. It said if women talked to men the way men talk to women, meaning the emphasis is on the women saying the thing not the man talking about it. It sucks that in trying to relay her experience of not being believed by men she implied that men donât face the same harm. That sucks. She clarified that she does know that men get raped and that men face those same harms, it was an oversight in trying to describe an almost ubiquitous female experience. If you asked her she would be upset that thatâs how the comic came across, and she was. It is what was implied by that comic but she has actually said the opposite of the thing you said she stands behind.
Rape is fucking horrible and itâs about power, and I sometimes fall into the trap of making it gendered because it is perpetrated by men so often, but men are also victims and weâre all in this together. Being a woman in this world sometimes feels like being prey, and itâs hard to talk about that in a way that isnât gendered, but the experience of being victimized isnât isolated to women at all and men face different harms associated with that victimization. This is a complicated thing to try to put in a comic, and saying that she believes men donât get raped is disingenuous because she has said the opposite. That was a bad panel of a comic that tried to make a point that ignored a huge harm, and she knows that. She hasnât said men donât get raped though, and I think saying she is a misandrist for the unintentional implication of misandry from a bad comic is a bit of a stretch.
Yeah I said itâs bad, she didnât think about the men who get raped, thatâs a bad thing. Itâs important to say that men do get raped and she doesnât need an analogy for it. She made further comics that acknowledge that pretty egregious oversight. I donât know what weird shit she said, I wasnât there, can you post it here? With more information I might change my mind. If this is actually something that sheâs stated as a view she holds and espouses then my comments wouldnât be relevant, what did she say?
It was a comic from her perspective about things that men have said to her, it discounted that men also experience those harms and was shitty for doing so. She acknowledged that. Sometimes people talk about harms they and their community face without thinking about how other communities also experience those harms and itâs important that they understand that. She didnât say that men donât experience that when talking about it and she followed up by making another comic that does acknowledge what men face. It came from a personal place of victimization that was hurtful because it ignored and erased other peoples pain. That sucks, and wasnât her intention as indicated by her later actions. The point was that women societally face harms, men also experience those harms so dividing it by gender wasnât a good idea. It was a bad comic.
It wasnât because sheâs a woman, it was because I had seen the original comic and that alone wouldnât condemn an author in my eyes if they handled it well and acknowledged the problem, which based on the conversation I was laboring under the misconception that she had. She didnât and that sucks. I have had so many conversations with men that were so shitty about rape and Iâve been told Iâm lying by someone I thought was a friend who just wanted to hurt me, and having this conversation is hard and I have a lot of room for victimâs expression of hurt, that doesnât extend to hurting other victims and Iâm understanding that thatâs what happened here.
No donât be sorry that was very well researched. Everything you wrote is reasonable and valid and I was wrong on this one, I thought it went down differently. Those responses seem like the problem to me, the comic itself was in poor taste, but she couldâve handled it gracefully and clarified and it sounds like she didnât and that sucks.
Yeah fair, Iâm going off of what everyone in this comment section has said that sheâs a misandrist and that just seems so extreme when the comic was bad but mostly bad because it didnât acknowledge hurt and then it seemed like she did in a later comic and has said explicitly the opposite of what people are saying she believes. It seemed like she got really defensive at first but then thought about it for a second. Like she was defending her depiction of misogyny and taking criticism as if people were saying misogyny isnât real (which it is of course). Idk I feel like there were very valid criticisms that she lumped in with the âget raped whoreâ comments. I guess the whole thing seemed like an overreaction from all sides but of course this is just from the discourse Iâve seen afterwards so I honestly shouldnât have commented on this conversation.
Thatâs a whole ass thread dude- what comment are you referring to where she said men donât get raped?
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Ive said itâs a bad comic like 10 times. Did you read my comment? Also you edited to say that she said that in the comic, not that sheâs ever said that explicitly anywhere else.