I admittedly don't have many friends... I probably try a bit too hard to be people's friends. A bit clingy if you will. I also have a sort of pride problem (I think it might be hereditary... Dad did-), and most of the time I just try to be nice. I like my quality time.

But since I started BJJ, it's all I want to do. When I'm off the mats I get kind of antsy. My best friend is my coach (a blue belt), who trains 6 days a week. Which is how much I wish I could train. I want to pour everything I have into Jiu-Jitsu because I feel it's all I have. All of my friends have abandoned me or ghosted me save for a couple. Maybe some wisdom for my aching heart and soul, as stupid as it sounds?