I'm a 32 y/o man, married and monogamous for 15 years. Prior to my wife, I had a singular male friend with benefits. We started off fooling around as a prank then things got more and more physical. We messed around a dozen times over the course of a few months, that I can remember, but that was it, we stopped once I started high school and nothing ever came up about it again. I always told myself "I'm not into guys, there wasn't anyone else who was doing it for me so why not." I've never hidden this from my wife, and she's always kind have suspected that I was bi, ever since I forgot to close out my web browser that one time, but I always maintained, "I'm not into guys, I just like watching them fuck."

Over the past several months we've had conversations about my desires and fantasies and I can finally openly say to myself and my wife, I am bisexual. But I don't want to be......

I'm not in denial and I'm not self-stigmatizing, I just wanna continue being happy with my wife, whom I love. I can't be sexual with other men or women, despite the fact my wife says we can try bi threesomes or that she'd just watch, because I want to continue being monogamous in my marriage...

I'm not sure if I'm asking for advice or just venting but what are your thoughts?