(19F) So, I’m very scared and confused. I’ve never thought too much about my sexuality. My best friend in the entire world is straight, and an amazing friend and ally. Ive been friends with her for so long, she’s family. I’ve always attracted men. Like a magnet. All my relationships have been with men. All my sexual experiences have been with men. But I’ve never fallen madly in love with a man. I don’t feel shit easily. Like… I know it’s weird. But I met this girl. She’s amazing. Like, for real. She’s not like anyone ive ever met before. And when I’m with her… idk. When we lock eyes I feel something. Not sure what it is. She’s beautiful and I would say im attracted to her, I guess? But I don’t know. I don’t have a good sense of self or my feelings. All I know is that we have something special. I’ve been questioning everything about myself. It’s silly, but I called my best friend to talk to her about everything and I just broke down. She wasn’t super surprised. She asked me if I thought I was gay. And hearing that word just made me break down. It’s so fucking stupid. She asked me why I was so scared and uncomfortable and I just changed the topic. There’s nothing wrong with it, I know this. I can’t wrap my head around why it makes me so uneasy. My parents are amazing, they wouldn’t give a shit. They are both very supportive and allies to that community. Idk what to do, what to feel. This girl I’m talking to is just a friend right now. But she’s hinting at something more. There’s an electricity in the air when I’m with her. She’s very physical with me. I don’t know what to do about this confusion. I know I’m not a lesbian. But im starting to question being bi. Even tho I hate labels. For myself in particular. What the hell do I do?