As the title suggests it, it took me a lot to come to terms with what transpired.

I was in a relationship with girls until an incident which took place and I realised that I was into men as well but I never dated any because I wasn’t sure how to go about it.

About a year and half ago, I met this colleague of mine and we got along, I didn’t realise that I was falling for him and after I did, I confided in him and he accepted it but he was already married.

We continued as friends, really good friends until one day things went further.

We both had a bit to drink and he kept touching me and I kept pushing him away because he was married. When I fell for him, I didn’t know it until I confided but a married man or woman is off limits for me.

He kept pressing me on it and at a point tried holding me down when I lost it and pushed him away. He got upset, got into a rage and beat me up. I of course defended myself and walked away. Followed me and started crying, apologising but I really broke down in front of him. I truly took him as a good friend, we were super close but I was really shattered that night.

We hugged and I don’t remember ever crying in front of a “friend” like that.

After that I told him that we can no longer be friends.

Been healing myself but for some reason I have not been very open to dating or even being open with my feelings. Something changed me that day but I am trying to heal myself.

I very recently start dating again but I’m hesitant about dating men now.