I am not trying to come off as a jackass, I just sometimes feel like I can't discuss certain things because I fall outside the binary or I feel like I don't fit in anywhere as a bisexual/queer non-op trans woman.

Over the course of since I joined the subreddits for the bi community I have noticed a lot of folks refer to their sex or relationships by the gender of the individual that they are dating and themselves.

Example being two men or two women in the bi sub will refer to their relationship as a "gay relationship" and vise versa if it was opposites, I feel like a lot of people might feel left out of these conversations due to not being binary, or feeling out of place, like why do we feel the need to other ourselves by referring to the sex we have as "gay sex" or "straight sex" as if they aren't both the same thing just involving two different people, like can we just call it "sex" and then fill in the details later?

Does anyone get what I am saying or am I falling on deaf ears here?

I had a discussion with one person about it and they were saying that their partner isn't bi, and that he is gay so it is a gay relationship but you're essentially erasing your bisexuality by doing so... why does your partners half of the relationship take priority over yours? Why can't we just call it a "relationship between two men?"

I guess I feel like our cis heteronormative culture is forcing us to label our relationships and the type of sex we have as different to other ourselves almost, as if the sex we have should be considered abnormal or different, as if the cishet society owns the original words and we got ours.

TLDR: I guess my point is Sex is Sex and our relationships are just relationships, why do we feel the need to add an orientation label to it as if it is any different to one another. Why does it stop at just Straight and Gay labels too, why not bi, or pan etc...